Epic (verbal) comebacks in cricket

[Clarke]

Nah mate, just the Ashes.

Australia offspinner Nathan Lyon's response during a tour game in Brighton to spectators who asked him if he had sandpaper in his pockets

 

 

Post the ones you came across in the past.

Edited June 25, 2018 by Clarke

[sourab10forever]



 

Credits : Scoop Whoop

[Number]

Eddo Brandes one was 

With that spontaneity he could be better comedian than Cricketer.

[Gollum]

 

https://www.scoopwhoop.com/sports/cricket-sledging/#.x6293h0us

[Sgattick10]

Hahaha Atherton classy 

[OpeningBatsman]

"Come to India"

     -Rohit Sharma  

Greatest response of all time. 

[OpeningBatsman]

 

 

[sriniwu]

Aussies, despite their penchant for aggro', have generally been at the receiving end of all the best sledges..they start the banter and end up looking like fools..

 

ravi shastri vs mike valletta is another example

[OpeningBatsman]

4 minutes ago, sriniwu said:

Aussies, despite their penchant for aggro', have generally been at the receiving end of all the best sledges..they start the banter and end up looking like fools..

 

ravi shastri vs mike valletta is another example

[Mosher]

Eddo Brandes one is a legendary sledge

[mishra]

Googled some. May you like it

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Grace’s ability to stand his ground would have done Sunil Gavaskar proud. Once, when the ball knocked off a bail, he replaced it and told the umpire: ” Twas the wind which took thy bail orf, good sir.”
The umpire replied: “Indeed, doctor, and let us hope thy wind helps the good doctor on thy journey back to the pavilion .”

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The best WG Grace sledge was on him, though, not from him. Charles Kortright had dismissed him four or five times in a county game – only for the umpires to keep turning down his appeals.. Finally, he uprooted two of Grace’s three stumps. Grace stalled, as though waiting for a no-ball call or something, before reluctantly walking off with Kortright’s words in his ears: ” Surely you’re not going, doctor? There’s still one stump standing.”

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Ian Healy’s made a legendary comment which was picked up by the Channel 9 microphones when Arjuna Ranatunga called for a runner on a particularly hot night during a one dayer in Sydney …

” You don’t get a runner for being an overweight, unfit, fat c*nt!”

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In one of the tour matches in South Africa , Australia played Hansie Cronje’s province. Cronje was at the non strikers end, there was a short chubby batsman on strike.

Ian Healy yelled to Warne, ” Bowl a Mars Bar half way down…We’ll get him stumped”
The Aussies and Cronje were all in hysterics, all this was before a classic reply from the batsman.
The exact words: ” Nah, Boonie (David Boon) fielding at short leg will be onto it before I can move.”

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Gavaskar had decided to relinquish his opening position and come in at no 4 for that test. But, Malcolm Marshall fired out Anshuman Gaekwad and Dilip Vengsarkar for ducks, setting the stage for Gavaskar to walk in at 0/2.And he thought there would be less pressure! Viv Richards says ” Man, it don’t matter where you come in to bat, the score is still zero.”

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Malcolm Marshall was bowling to David Boon who had played and missed a couple of times. Marshall :  ” Now David, Are you going to get out now or am I going to have to bowl around the wicket and kill you? “

 

[Suhaan]

Poor chap Mcgrath

[mishra]

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Ben Hollioake had just made his debut, hitting Glenn McGrath in the process. On his way back after finally being dismissed,

Shane Warne cried: ‘Hey, Ben’ Hollioake turned round expecting a pat on the back.

Instead Healy came in from behind and said:

‘Get back to the nets, you idiot.’

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n the 1980’s Ian Botham returned early from a tour of Pakistan , and on radio joked ” Pakistan is the sort of country to send your mother in-law to .” Needless to say the Pakistanis did not find this amusing, and when Pakistan defeated England in the 1992 World Cup Final, Aamer Sohail told Ian Botham

” Why don’t you send your mother-in-law out to play, she cannot do much worse.” 

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England ‘s “Barmy Army” recently decided to sledge leg spinner Shane Warne musically, and it has been described as boorishly personal, but effective.
The sledge was based on Chirpy Chirpy Cheep Cheep – the ” Where’s your poppa gone?” Song. It has been converted to “ Where’s your missus gone? ” (Warne had recently been divorced with his wife )

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Once, during the tour of West Indies, a young bowler was trying to get under Gavaskar’s skin by sledging. Gavaskar, a senior player retorted :

“Son, don’t waste time sledging at me. I have been sledged at more often than you have taken a piss”.

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Trueman bowls. Batsman is trapped plumb LBW. Trueman appeals. Not out.

Next ball. Trueman ever-so-slightly irritated.  Trueman bowls.  Audible snick, ball deflects and sails upward, caught behind.  Trueman appeals.  Not out.

Third ball. Trueman a little more irritated now. Trueman bowls. Through the gate, stumps spread-eagled, middle stump uprooted and cartwheeling. Trueman turns to the umpire and says with a wry smile, ‘We nearly had him that time, didn’t we?’

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Barmy Army

• He’s fat, he’s round, he bounces on the ground, Shane Warne, Shane Warne.

 

 

 

[rageaddict]

Dont know why Mc Grath was so furious, if you initiate something like he did then be ready to receive it.

[diga]

Miandad & Merv Hughes...

 

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While facing Hughes in an over Miandad said, “You should be driving buses. You are a bus driver, too fat to be playing cricket.”

But soon, Hughes dismissed Miandad and while the Miandad made his way to the pavilion, Hughes ran up to him and asked, “ticket please.”

 

[Nikhil_cric]

Botham and Rod marsh. Road marsh goes up and asks "How's your wife and my kids"? to which Botham calmly replied "The wife is fine, the kids are retarded though" 

 

"Get ready for a broken effin arm" - Clarke to Anderson (more a threat than a sledge though)

 

*Off the field* Shane warne mocked Ranatunga's weight issues to which the Lankan publicly retorted " It is none of his business if i swallow a pig or a goat. At least i never took banned drugs and then blamed it on my mother"

 

Kohli to faulkner " I've smashed you enough in my life"

 

But this has to be the most scary though not a sledge. Border sledged Brian Mcmillan and Brian sledged back but he was not satisfied so he walked into the Australian dressing room with a security guy's gun and pointed it at border who was almost in tears before brian said he was joking and walked off.

 

 

[philcric]

23 hours ago, rageaddict said:

Dont know why Mc Grath was so furious, if you initiate something like he did then be ready to receive it.

 

Not sure but I think McGrath's wife was battling cancer at that time. 

 

Anyway McGrath shouldn't have started such a sledge in the first place.