BCCI hires Boston Consulting Group to figure out donkeys in Team India

[rkt.india]

http://www.cricketcountry.com/cricket-articles/BCCI-hires-Boston-Consulting-Group-to-figure-out-donkeys-in-Team-India/5288 The Board of Control for Cricket in India (BCCI) may have kicked up a storm over Nasser HussainÃÔ donkey remark in reference to Indian fielders. But behind the scenes, the Board seems to be treating HussainÃÔ comment as a genuine assessment and has been moving rather swiftly to remedy the situation. Å£CCI always has the best interests of Indian cricket at heart. So, while we are not afraid to pull up the ECB for NasserÃÔ unwarranted remark, we would also be the first to introspect and figure out who the offending donkeys are, said Rajiv Shukla, vice-president of BCCI. Å£esides, if BCCI ends up coming under RTI, this might be the first question we are asked. We gotta be ready! The Board has roped in strategy consulting major, Boston Consulting Group (BCG) to carry out an objective assessment of the players and identify the donkeys in the team. The project, titled Ũadha kaun? was initially supposed to begin with an attempt to understand what exactly a donkey refers to in the context of the Indian team. Ūt is important to understand the exact meaning of the word said a thoughtful Rishi Suri, partner BCG. Å¥id Nasser Hussain mean that because of a lot of injuries, a few men were bearing the burden of the entire team, and were therefore the beasts of burden? Which would mean Dravid is the biggest donkey in the team? Or did he refer to the way the players moved about in the field and made asses of themselves? Or was Naseer subliminally thinking of Poonam PandeyÃÔ posterior when he made the cheeky reference to donkeys? However, BCCI quickly cut this line of thought leaving BCG no option but to start directly with the assumption that some players may indeed be donkey-like in their approach to the gentlemanÃÔ game. BCG will now adapt its famed BCG growth-share matrix to answer the million dollar question. According to this framework, the players would now be categorized as follows: Stars: Players whose ground fielding and catching are exceptional. Action: Teach them batting/bowling. Safe hands: Players who take catches safely but would rather die before they dive. Action: Cut down on the KFC bucket. Donkeys: Players who canÃÕ do either even in their dreams. Action: If the player is one of the big four, spread rumours about his retirement, else kick him out. Question marks: Players who cannot catch for nuts, but are otherwise good fielders. Action: BCG hasnÃÕ figured out what to do with such players which is why they labeled them question marks in the first place. Players have generally reacted rather blankly to this news. However, unconfirmed reports suggest that skipper Mahendra Singh Dhoni is leaning on the BCG team to get Shantakumaran Sreesanth categorised as a donkey. When asked to comment, Rishi Suri remained non-committal, and replied cryptically Å*et the analysis take its course. BCG has reportedly charged the BCCI a ton of money for this donkey work.

[rkt.india]

:hysterical: