Cricket humour

[King]

Thought we need some hearted moments here among the serious discussions. Let me start with the commies muck up : 'Welcome to Leicester, where Ray Illingworth has just relieved himself at the pavilion end.' 'Barry Richards, the great South African batsman, has just hit one of Basil D'Olivera's balls clean out of the ground' 'Boycott has advanced down the pitch, opening his legs and showing up his class' 'Kalicharan jas just had a slash outside off stump' 'Norman O'Neill is fielding in the leg slip position, legs wide apart, waiting for a tickle.' 'The batsman has chanced his arm and it's come off.' The BBC newsreader reading out the cricket results:'Yorkshire, all out for 364, Hutton out ill. I'm sorry, I'll read that again. Hutton out, 111.' 'Hadlee is a bowler who can bounce his balls past the batsman's nose.' 'Geoff Howarth has played the ball through the on side for two runs. That was a fine shit - ah, I mean fine shot.' Ian Chappell, the former Australian captain, had a habit of hitching his box after he had played a shot at the ball. The TV camera moved in, but the commentator wasn't watching the screen when he said, 'Well, it's been a good pitch. Only two balls have moved all day.' 'John Emburey, the English off-spinner, is bowling with two short legs and one of them is wearing a helmet.' During the 1960 test match between England and West Indies at Sabina Park in Jamaica, the commentator said, 'Well, it's a nice day here at Sabina Park. The wind is shining and the sun is blowing gently across the ground.' Arthur Morris had played well for Australia during the day except that he had dropped England's batsman Jack Crapp or, as the commentator said, 'Morris had had a good day, but he has had one blemish. He dropped Crapp in the outfield.'

[audioman]

Re: Cricket humour "The batsman's Holding, the bowler's Willey."

[Lurker]

Re: Cricket humour That is the first time I have ever had two balls coming towards me. -- Alan Knott after witnessing a streaker run and jump over the batsmen crease while he was wicket-keeping. Skipper now I know what they meant by "Its not over till the last ball is thrown" -- Doug Walters on his way back to pavillion after Greg Chappell had asked Trevor Chapell to do that in a game against NZ.

[King]

Re: Cricket humour This one is from one of Hadlee's books : There are more than 800 million people living in India. A high percentage are cricket lovers and many of them are fanatical about the game. They turn up in thousands to watch, support and cheer on their heroes. It's a rare sight to see any empty seats in the stadiums. When we played in Bombay at the Wankhede Stadium the gates closed an hour before play was due to commence. The stadium was absolutely packed except for one empty seat outside the players's viewing area. When I asked an Indian gentleman why the seat was vacant, he replied, 'It is my wife's seat, but she passed away recently.' 'I'm sorry to hear that.' I said. 'Surely you have a friend who could use the seat?' The man replied, 'Oh yes, sir, I have, but all my friends are at my wife's funeral.'

[Lurker]

Re: Cricket humour

There are more than 800 million people living in India. A high percentage are cricket lovers and many of them are fanatical about the game. They turn up in thousands to watch, support and cheer on their heroes. It's a rare sight to see any empty seats in the stadiums. When we played in Bombay at the Wankhede Stadium the gates closed an hour before play was due to commence. The stadium was absolutely packed except for one empty seat outside the players's viewing area. When I asked an Indian gentleman why the seat was vacant, he replied, 'It is my wife's seat, but she passed away recently.' 'I'm sorry to hear that.' I said. 'Surely you have a friend who could use the seat?' The man replied, 'Oh yes, sir, I have, but all my friends are at my wife's funeral.'

Hahaha..True cricket fan. I was reading Sir Neville Cardus's article yesterday evening before went to bed. Would scan it sometime and share here but let me just say that he got married when he was watching his beloved Lancashire play a game. Went off for the wedding and came back as we - he and wife, after having missed 17 minutes or so, surely a sacrilege for any true cricket fan(his words). Another humorous anecdore is the banner that went up in the game when West Indies fast bowler Uton Dowe was slaughtered by Aussies. The gentleman with the banner proclaimed a new Commandment of the order of "Dowe shalt not bowl!" xxx

[yoda]

Re: Cricket humour :lmao: :lmao: :lmao:

[Rajiv]

Re: Cricket humour Cricket in 1900s and a woman hears Radio Commentary for the 1st time "Captain has one short leg and one short square leg and one deep fine leg" Woman faints

[Mr. Wicket]

Re: Cricket humour The Nawab of Pataudi (Sr.) was one of three Indians playing for England who made a hundred on his test debut (along with Ranjitsinjhi and Duleepsinjhi). Pataudi's maiden ton was notably sluggish (coming in almost 6 hours). At one point during the innings, Australian batsman Vic Richardson was chirping about the pace of his innings from slip. Pataudi defended himself: "I'm gauging the pace of the pitch." "Yes, but it's changed three times since you got in."