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Few short ones


apocalypse

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A TV channel was conducting a survey on whether there was too much $ex in movies these days. An old woman was walking through the mall when a reporter and cameraman stopped her. ?I?m taking a survey,? he said. ?Do you think there is too much $ex in movies?? ?I?m not sure,? replied the old woman. ?I?m usually too wrapped up in the film to notice what the rest of the audience is doing.? ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------- An old cowboy went to a bar and ordered a drink. As he sat sipping his whiskey, a young lady sat down next to him. She turned to the cowboy and asked, "Are you a real cowboy?" He replied, "Well, I've spent my whole life on the ranch, herding horses, mending fences, and branding cattle, so I guess I am." She said, "I'm a le$bian. I spend my whole day thinking about women. As soon as I get up in the morning, I think about women. When I shower, I think about women. As I watch TV, or even eat, I think about women. Everything seems to make me think about women." The two sat sipping in silence. A short time later, a man sat down on the other side of the old cowboy and asked, "Are you a real cowboy?" He replied, "I always thought I was, but I just found out I'm a le$bian." ---------------------------------------------------------------------------- A young girl was going on a date. Her grandmother said, "Sit here and let me tell you about those young boys." "He is going to try and kiss you, you are going to like that, but don't let him do that. He is going to try and feel your breast, you are going to like that but don't let him do that. But most important, he is going to try and get on top of you to have his way with you. You are going to like that, but don't let him do that. It will disgrace the family." With that bit of advice, the granddaughter went on her date. The next day she told grandma that her date went just like she had predicted, "Grandma, I didn't let him disgrace the family. When he tried, I just turned over, got on top of him, and disgraced HIS family..." Granny fainted!

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