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Aftab Ameen Poonawala brutal murderer

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The blame is with parents. They do not instill confidence in their kids, especially girls. If she had left him, she must have feared that her family would blame her for the wrong decision of choosing him. Making wrong decisions should be encouraged. You learn from them. Imposed decisions are wrong because you suppress your own will.

 

Kids make mistakes, but they do come back to you and as parents, you just ensure that they have learned their lesson from it. You encourage them to move on. She would have been a much wiser kid if her family had accepted her the way she was.

 

I can totally understand what this poor girl had been going through. Animals like in this case, are constantly in lookout for such vulnerable kids. She was an easy prey. As parents, one should never give up on their kids. It is their responsibility. 

 

Om shanti. 

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12 hours ago, dial_100 said:

The blame is with parents. They do not instill confidence in their kids, especially girls. If she had left him, she must have feared that her family would blame her for the wrong decision of choosing him. Making wrong decisions should be encouraged. You learn from them. Imposed decisions are wrong because you suppress your own will.

 

Kids make mistakes, but they do come back to you and as parents, you just ensure that they have learned their lesson from it. You encourage them to move on. She would have been a much wiser kid if her family had accepted her the way she was.

 

I can totally understand what this poor girl had been going through. Animals like in this case, are constantly in lookout for such vulnerable kids. She was an easy prey. As parents, one should never give up on their kids. It is their responsibility

 

Om shanti. 

 

She was 27 years old and not a kid, legally & factually speaking. Making mistakes and learning from them applies with childhood/teen years and smaller aspects. One doesn't encourage their adult children to take up cocaine & smoking, yeah kid go ahead u'll learn from it and hopefully give it up. 

 

Its disgusting to blame the family while they would have tried to correct her most colossal mistake without going against the law. 

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13 hours ago, dial_100 said:

The blame is with parents. They do not instill confidence in their kids, especially girls. If she had left him, she must have feared that her family would blame her for the wrong decision of choosing him. Making wrong decisions should be encouraged. You learn from them. Imposed decisions are wrong because you suppress your own will.

 

Kids make mistakes, but they do come back to you and as parents, you just ensure that they have learned their lesson from it. You encourage them to move on. She would have been a much wiser kid if her family had accepted her the way she was.

 

I can totally understand what this poor girl had been going through. Animals like in this case, are constantly in lookout for such vulnerable kids. She was an easy prey. As parents, one should never give up on their kids. It is their responsibility. 

 

Om shanti. 

Lol as if she was a 15-16 year old....  So called Straaaaang Independent woman.  Parents are to be blamed for sure but girl shares most of the blame. 

I doubt woke brigade would learn anything from the incident. 

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Just now, Lone Wolf said:

Lol as if she was a 15-16 year old....  So called Straaaaang Independent woman.  Parents are to be blamed for sure but girl shares most of the blame. 

I doubt woke brigade would learn anything from the incident. 

 

Please, no 'blaming' the victims (the late woman & even her family). I know it isn't to absolve the criminal but it sounds crass after all they have gone through.

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I said the same thing earlier. Hindu parents treat bad marriages of kids as a taboo and rarely  welcome their daughters back home. Home is not just shelter, but a support system. The fact that the girl endures violence and abuse as she has no other support. If the parents had not given up on her, she would probably fight him and get back instead of having no self-esteem. So many women either get killed or commit suicide as the have no other option. Beti kabhi nahin paraya hoti hain! There is a lesson here for parents. 

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There is a regressive element in blaming the parents. If she can leave family for boyfriend, she can leave boyfriend full stop. She should be able to stand for herself as an adult and not be portrayed as abla naari. Yes we have societal problems, but since the parents were deprioritized after more than 2 decades of care, stand up on your feet and deprioritize the boyfriend now. Not blaming her, just showing the way forward. 

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3 hours ago, Lone Wolf said:

Lol as if she was a 15-16 year old....  So called Straaaaang Independent woman.  Parents are to be blamed for sure but girl shares most of the blame. 

I doubt woke brigade would learn anything from the incident. 

They even went to the guy's parents to get them to agree for a marriage between the two.  What more could they do? Every grown person has to take care of their own safety. She should have run long ago and temporarily moved to a working woman's hostel before deciding if she should go back to her parents.Also, there are Mahila organizations which give hell to husbands in divorce battles but none to help real victims of  abuse? One can only hope this case has opened the eyes of other women facing the same situation to do what they need to do to save themselves.

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3 hours ago, nevada said:

They even went to the guy's parents to get them to agree for a marriage between the two.  What more could they do? Every grown person has to take care of their own safety. She should have run long ago and temporarily moved to a working woman's hostel before deciding if she should go back to her parents.Also, there are Mahila organizations which give hell to husbands in divorce battles but none to help real victims of  abuse? One can only hope this case has opened the eyes of other women facing the same situation to do what they need to do to save themselves.

Exactly it was genuine domestic abuse as well...  Cannot defend plain stupidity on her part. 

That Monster deserves to rot in hell but one can't simply ignore girl had plenty of hints and chances. 

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5 hours ago, coffee_rules said:

I said the same thing earlier. Hindu parents treat bad marriages of kids as a taboo and rarely  welcome their daughters back home. Home is not just shelter, but a support system. The fact that the girl endures violence and abuse as she has no other support. If the parents had not given up on her, she would probably fight him and get back instead of having no self-esteem. So many women either get killed or commit suicide as the have no other option. Beti kabhi nahin paraya hoti hain! There is a lesson here for parents. 

Live in relationship only makes matters worse especially in a country like India... Its Success rate would be alarmingly low too. 

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I am surprised that how generalization is going on in this thread regarding society and parents.

 

Shraddha Walkar: ‘That short rebel’ caught in a toxic loop

At the funeral, she met her father but such was the bitterness she felt towards her father that she barely exchanged a few words. However, just a month later, she met her father, and just as she had with her mother, she told him about the abuse and violence she was facing at Aaftab’s hands. “I told her to leave him and to come back home, but she said that she was 25 years old and capable of fighting her own battles. She told me not to interfere in her life,” Vikas Walkar told the police.
 
___
Shradha was extremely modern rebellious girl coming from a broken marriage. She consider herself rebel but was unable to do anything when stuck with Aftab. Her relation was with her father not good and her mother died earlier. No wonder there were hardly any people to look out for her
 
 
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7 hours ago, Singh bling said:

I am surprised that how generalization is going on in this thread regarding society and parents.

 

Shraddha Walkar: ‘That short rebel’ caught in a toxic loop

At the funeral, she met her father but such was the bitterness she felt towards her father that she barely exchanged a few words. However, just a month later, she met her father, and just as she had with her mother, she told him about the abuse and violence she was facing at Aaftab’s hands. “I told her to leave him and to come back home, but she said that she was 25 years old and capable of fighting her own battles. She told me not to interfere in her life,” Vikas Walkar told the police.
 
___
Shradha was extremely modern rebellious girl coming from a broken marriage. She consider herself rebel but was unable to do anything when stuck with Aftab. Her relation was with her father not good and her mother died earlier. No wonder there were hardly any people to look out for her
 
 

There is nothing rebel about saving someone beyond saving. That guy clearly hurt her multiple times. She should have left him. These happen quite a lot in Indian Families personally know a story like this where guy blackmails wife about hurting himself if she reports him to police but still hits her. They stay together because of kids. In these situations being selfish is taking care of themselves.

Edited by gattaca
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7 hours ago, Singh bling said:

I am surprised that how generalization is going on in this thread regarding society and parents.

 

Shraddha Walkar: ‘That short rebel’ caught in a toxic loop

At the funeral, she met her father but such was the bitterness she felt towards her father that she barely exchanged a few words. However, just a month later, she met her father, and just as she had with her mother, she told him about the abuse and violence she was facing at Aaftab’s hands. “I told her to leave him and to come back home, but she said that she was 25 years old and capable of fighting her own battles. She told me not to interfere in her life,” Vikas Walkar told the police.
 
___
Shradha was extremely modern rebellious girl coming from a broken marriage. She consider herself rebel but was unable to do anything when stuck with Aftab. Her relation was with her father not good and her mother died earlier. No wonder there were hardly any people to look out for her
 
 

How you know father is speaking the truth or not selectively quoting his conversation to defend himself. Rebellious or not, parents should create trust in their children that no time is too late for help or support from them.

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8 minutes ago, Pollack said:

How you know father is speaking the truth or not selectively quoting his conversation to defend himself. Rebellious or not, parents should create trust in their children that no time is too late for help or support from them.

 

He has lost his daughter. What is the point of defending himself? This is not some job he is trying to save. You can only bring up your children to a certain extent. After they become adults there is very little you can do if they don't want you to. How your children turn out after they leave the nest is on them. You can help and support - but only if it is asked for. Not when they do everything (like this girl did) to prevent you from doing anything. 

Edited by bharathh
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1 hour ago, bharathh said:

 

He has lost his daughter. What is the point of defending himself? This is not some job he is trying to save. You can only bring up your children to a certain extent. After they become adults there is very little you can do if they don't want you to. How your children turn out after they leave the nest is on them. You can help and support - but only if it is asked for. Not when they do everything (like this girl did) to prevent you from doing anything. 

 

Having said this. What a nightmarish scenario for parents. This is why I think we need to become fully open as society. If we have decided to take western route let's take it fully. Let the girl date openly and speak about it clearly. Let the guy come and meet parents. Let us not be coy about it. 

 

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On 11/25/2022 at 3:28 AM, Singh bling said:

I am surprised that how generalization is going on in this thread regarding society and parents.

 

Shraddha Walkar: ‘That short rebel’ caught in a toxic loop

At the funeral, she met her father but such was the bitterness she felt towards her father that she barely exchanged a few words. However, just a month later, she met her father, and just as she had with her mother, she told him about the abuse and violence she was facing at Aaftab’s hands. “I told her to leave him and to come back home, but she said that she was 25 years old and capable of fighting her own battles. She told me not to interfere in her life,” Vikas Walkar told the police.
 
___
Shradha was extremely modern rebellious girl coming from a broken marriage. She consider herself rebel but was unable to do anything when stuck with Aftab. Her relation was with her father not good and her mother died earlier. No wonder there were hardly any people to look out for her
 
 

"In her day-to-day life, she had slipped into being a helpless woman, caught in a cycle of vicious abuse, that everyone noticed, but did not care sufficiently to pull her out of"

 

This is not some small town case where there's hardly a few hundred population and everyone knows everyone. Mumbai is mega city where no-one has anytime as they are too busy with their lives. The police and the Doctor who attended to her would have seen hazaar such cases and they can't realistically be expected to do anything. People in her circle did care, that's why her friend took her to the police station but she withdrew the complaint. Other friends urged her to get out but she wouldn't listen.  

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