Steve Harmison admits contemplating suicide during England career

[StriKe]

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"The demons had not bothered to travel. They had come to get me at home, in the middle of a very successful English summer. That's the thing with depression: It doesn't care if you're a millionaire, a successful doctor, a nurse, postman, airline pilot...and it doesn't care if you're the number one bowler in the world.

 

 

Harmison sought help from the England medical staff including the team doctor Peter Gregory and the physio Kirk Russell. He was asked if he had ever felt of harming himself. "The honest answer was "Maybe"," he writes. "I can't say there haven't been some dark times where I thought it would be easier if I wasn't here."

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"I am sobbing my eyes out. For four days, I've been ill just thinking about this moment. The pains in my stomach are so bad I've had to lie on the floor, the lump in my throat so large I can hardly breathe. There are lots of roundabouts on the short drive to Newcastle airport. What if I pull out on somebody at one of them? If I do it right, I'll buy myself another few days at home.

 

 

"In 2004, I had never felt worse. What was in that car, setting off to tour South Africa, was a broken shell. When I say I was thinking of crashing the car on the way to the airport, I'm serious."

http://www.cricbuzz.com/cricket-news/95274/steve-harmison-admits-contemplating-suicide-during-england-cricket-team