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Nuns


Don Sharma

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Two nuns are ordered to paint a room in the convent, and the last instruction of the Mother Superior is that they must not get even a drop of paint on their habits. After conferring about this for a while, the two nuns decide to lock the door of the room, strip off their habits, and paint in the nude. In the middle of the project, there comes a knock at the door. "Who is it?" calls one of the nuns. "Blind man," replies a voice from the other side of the door. The two nuns look at each other and shrug, and, deciding that no harm can come from letting a blind man into the room, they open the door. "Nice gazongas," says the man, "where do you want these blinds?"
Three nuns die and go to heaven where they are met by St Peter at the pearly gates. St Pete says "Ladies, you all led such wonderful lives, that I'm granting you six months to go back to Earth and be anyone you want". The first nun says "I want to be Bo Derek," and POOF she's gone. The second says "I want to be Madonna," and POOF she's gone. The third says "I want to be Virginia Pepalini.". St Peter looks perplexed. "Who?" he says. "Virginia Pepalini" replies the nun. St Peter shakes his head and says "I'm sorry, that name just doesn't ring a bell. The nun then takes a newspaper out of her habit and hands it to St Peter. He reads the paper and starts laughing. He hands it back to her and says "No Sister, this says the Virginia Pipeline was laid by 500 men in 7 days!".
Three nuns were talking. The first nun said, "I was cleaning the Father's room the other day, and I found a bunch of pornographic magazines." "What did you do?" the second nun asked. "I threw them in the trash, of course." "Well," said the second nun, "I was in the Father's room putting away laundry and found a bunch of condoms." "What did you do?" the first nun asked. "I poked holes in them." "Oh, crap," said the third nun.
:cantstop: PS: Just for gags...no offence meant.
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