punjabiplaya Posted May 11, 2011 Author Share Posted May 11, 2011 Seve ballesteros has been buried in a grave with has father. His final round therefore was 1 over par Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
punjabiplaya Posted May 11, 2011 Author Share Posted May 11, 2011 A nun is sitting on a train opposite a nig*er who is eating a tub of prawns. Every time he eats one he spits the head at the nun, who tries to ignore him,Eventually, she gets pis*ed off and pulls the emergency cord. The nig*er looks at her and says "You'll get fined £50 for that you stupid bit*h" and laughs. The nun laughs back and says "When I cry r*pe and they smell your fingers you'll get 15 years you black cu*t !!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
punjabiplaya Posted May 11, 2011 Author Share Posted May 11, 2011 A man says to his wife get ready, you, me & the dog are going fishing. Wife says I dont want 2 go. Man gives her 3 choices. Fishing, blowjob or take it up the ar*e. Wife picks blow job. After sucking for a while she says, ur c*ck taste like sh*t. He says, 'I know, the dog didnt want to go fishing either!' Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
punjabiplaya Posted May 12, 2011 Author Share Posted May 12, 2011 A gypsy mum catches her son fingering his sister. She says"You'd better tell me something that's going to make this alright!"Son replies,"I've found dad's wedding ring...."! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
punjabiplaya Posted May 12, 2011 Author Share Posted May 12, 2011 Dad comes home 2 find his 17yr old daughter with a pink dildo up her bum "What the hell r u doing?" He shouts "Well, u wont let me have a boyfriend, so this is my boyfriend substitute!" The next night the daughter comes home 2 find her dad drinking a can of beer with the pink dildo up HIS bum "What the hell r U doing?"...she shouts. He replies "Having a beer with ur boyfriend Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
punjabiplaya Posted May 14, 2011 Author Share Posted May 14, 2011 Are you insured for Sex?? The Correct Insurance Companies are, Sex with your wife - Legal and General Sex on the Telephone - Direct Line Sex with your partner - Standard Life Sex with a Transvestite - Confused. Com Sex with someone different - Go Compare Sex with a Fat Bird - More Than Sex on the back seat of a Car - Sheila's Wheels Sex with a posh Bird - Privileged Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
punjabiplaya Posted May 14, 2011 Author Share Posted May 14, 2011 apologies in advance for arsenal fans... What's 9 inches long and dangle s in front of a Cu*t ? Arsene wengers tie Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
punjabiplaya Posted May 14, 2011 Author Share Posted May 14, 2011 Man goes to doctors and says, I've been raped by an elephant,Doctor looks & says, funny, your ass is 10 inches wide but an elephant's co*k is only 3 inches wide,Man replies yes, but the bastard fingered me 1st Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
punjabiplaya Posted May 14, 2011 Author Share Posted May 14, 2011 What Do You Call A Gay Indian.. Jusvant Chithar :hysterical: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
punjabiplaya Posted May 14, 2011 Author Share Posted May 14, 2011 I got kicked out of the bookshop today. Apparently I wasn't allowed to move Kate McCann's book into the murder mystery section. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
punjabiplaya Posted May 14, 2011 Author Share Posted May 14, 2011 What are the two most important holes in a woman's body? No, not those two, you preverted as*hole! Nostrils! They allow her to breathe during a Blow-Job! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sachinrox Posted May 14, 2011 Share Posted May 14, 2011 ^We all know that wats the fuss abt :dontknow: ? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
punjabiplaya Posted May 15, 2011 Author Share Posted May 15, 2011 A 10 year old nigerian boy jonah Umbongo walks 5 miles a day to fetch water in the deadly heat of africa. Just £2 per day can help teach jonah to read and write so he can lead a better life... WARNING. Do not fall for this scam...The fecker then grows up, moves to england and walks 20 miles a day putting fecking parking tickets on our cars! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
punjabiplaya Posted May 15, 2011 Author Share Posted May 15, 2011 Carlos Tevez £47 million pound, David Silva £30 million pound, Yaya Toure £25 million pound, Edin Dzeko £27 million pound, Mario Balioteli £24 million pound, winning the F.A Cup, pricey. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dark Warrior Posted May 15, 2011 Share Posted May 15, 2011 Scientists have shown that the moon is moving away at a tiny, although measurable distance from the earth every year.If you do the maths, you can calculate that 85 million years ago the moon was orbiting the earth at a distance of about 35 feet from the earth's surface.This would explain the death of the dinosaurs. The tallest ones, anyway. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
punjabiplaya Posted May 15, 2011 Author Share Posted May 15, 2011 Wots the difference between my Toolbox & the Premiership?. Next season my Tool will still have HAMMERS in it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
punjabiplaya Posted May 15, 2011 Author Share Posted May 15, 2011 Why does a squirrel swim on its back? To keep its nuts dry. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dark Warrior Posted May 16, 2011 Share Posted May 16, 2011 Recently a man had to go to the hospital to have his wedding ring cut off from his dick after his mistress found the ring in his trouser pocket and got so mad at him she stuck it on him while he was asleepI don't know what's worse:1) Having your mistress find out you're married.2) Explaining to your wife how your wedding ring got on your dick3) Or finding out your dick fits through your wedding ring. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sid Posted May 16, 2011 Share Posted May 16, 2011 Recently a man had to go to the hospital to have his wedding ring cut off from his dick after his mistress found the ring in his trouser pocket and got so mad at him she stuck it on him while he was asleepI don't know what's worse:1) Having your mistress find out you're married.2) Explaining to your wife how your wedding ring got on your dick3) Or finding out your dick fits through your wedding ring. :cantstop: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dark Warrior Posted May 16, 2011 Share Posted May 16, 2011 Maun vrat ke din wife apne pati ko boobs hilake dikhane lagi, to pati L**d hilane lagaa. Biwi: Kabhi sex ke alawa bhi kuch socho, main pooch rahi thi ki doodh kab laaoge? Pati: Abe saali tharki, maine bola, ek ghante mein. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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