DomainK Posted February 22, 2011 Posted February 22, 2011 Since the world cup fever is on, lets have some cricket fun. :two_thumbs_up: I will try not to repeat the old jokes..
DomainK Posted February 22, 2011 Author Posted February 22, 2011 Cricket - A sport that requires five days of consecutive sunshine. Invented in........ England.
DomainK Posted February 22, 2011 Author Posted February 22, 2011 I bumped into Steve Bucknor in the street today. I said, "Are you aware of the uproar caused after you gave Sachin Tendulkar out in that match? I mean, two Star Sports pundits were..." "Yeah yeah," he interrupted. "Tell me something I don't know." So I explained the LBW rule.
Sachin=GOD Posted February 22, 2011 Posted February 22, 2011 Gandhi's last words were - "Hey Ram". Ponting's last words would be "Hey Laxman
DomainK Posted February 22, 2011 Author Posted February 22, 2011 Ricky Ponting walks into a library. The librarian raises his index finger and says, "Out!" _____________________________________________________ Ricky Ponting walks into a library and says "Do you have any books on the Ashes"? The Librarian says; "**** off, mate. You won't bring 'em back!" --------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Ricky Ponting walks into a library and asks "Do you have any books on Australian cricketers?" The librarian says "They are all out."
DomainK Posted February 22, 2011 Author Posted February 22, 2011 I just went to the BBC website and clicked on the link "Live - England v Pakistan" A message came up saying "Click to play." So that's how they pick the England team then.
DomainK Posted February 22, 2011 Author Posted February 22, 2011 Gandhi's last words were - "Hey Ram". Ponting's last words would be "Hey Laxman :haha::haha::haha::haha:
DomainK Posted February 22, 2011 Author Posted February 22, 2011 What do you call a group of cows? A herd. What do you call a group of ducks? Pakistani batsmen.
DomainK Posted February 22, 2011 Author Posted February 22, 2011 Apparently on winning the toss Strauss said to Ponting "You can bat", to which Ricky replied "You think so? Thanks for the encouragement." ! :haha:
Sachin=GOD Posted February 22, 2011 Posted February 22, 2011 4 captains are standing in a room boasting about their teams batting skills: austrailian captain: hum to sirf 6 marte hain; england captain: hum to sirf 4 marte hain; indian captain: (sees the best has been taken so shrugs and says): hum to bhai style marte hain; everyone looks at the relaxed pakistani captain who says: hum to seedha coach marte hain!!
Sachin=GOD Posted February 22, 2011 Posted February 22, 2011 What do you call a group of cows? A herd. What do you call a group of ducks? Pakistani batsmen. :giggle::giggle: Apparently on winning the toss Strauss said to Ponting "You can bat"' date=' to which Ricky replied "You think so? Thanks for the encouragement." ! :haha:[/quote'] :hysterical::hysterical::hysterical::hysterical:
DomainK Posted February 22, 2011 Author Posted February 22, 2011 I went to Shahid Afridi’s place to watch a cricket match. Midway I walked upto the fridge, pulled a pepsi bottle out and asked “mate, got any opener?” He gave me a death stare, chewed the crown off the bottle and said “No, but I make it up with my teeth.”
EnterTheVoid Posted February 22, 2011 Posted February 22, 2011 Batsmen sledges Dwayne Leverock: "Mate, you're so fat, you need two wrist watches, one on each hand coz you're in two different timezones"
Jadoo Posted February 22, 2011 Posted February 22, 2011 Batsmen sledges Dwayne Leverock: "Mate, you're so fat, you need two wrist watches, one on each hand coz you're in two different timezones" :cantstop:
gaurav92 Posted February 23, 2011 Posted February 23, 2011 4 captains are standing in a room boasting about their teams batting skills: austrailian captain: hum to sirf 6 marte hain; england captain: hum to sirf 4 marte hain; indian captain: (sees the best has been taken so shrugs and says): hum to bhai style marte hain; everyone looks at the relaxed pakistani captain who says: hum to seedha coach marte hain!! I went to Shahid Afridi’s place to watch a cricket match. Midway I walked upto the fridge, pulled a pepsi bottle out and asked “mate, got any opener?†He gave me a death stare, chewed the crown off the bottle and said “No, but I make it up with my teeth.†Batsmen sledges Dwayne Leverock: "Mate, you're so fat, you need two wrist watches, one on each hand coz you're in two different timezones" Apparently on winning the toss Strauss said to Ponting "You can bat"' date=' to which Ricky replied "You think so? Thanks for the encouragement." ! :haha:[/quote'] I bumped into Steve Bucknor in the street today. I said, "Are you aware of the uproar caused after you gave Sachin Tendulkar out in that match? I mean, two Star Sports pundits were..." "Yeah yeah," he interrupted. "Tell me something I don't know." So I explained the LBW rule. :hysterical::hysterical::hysterical::hysterical::hysterical::hysterical::hysterical:
gaurav92 Posted February 23, 2011 Posted February 23, 2011 The standard of batting in the local side was very low. Even at the net practice, they couldn't hit a thing. Finally, the captain rushed forward and grabbed the bat. 'Now bowl me some fast ones!' he yelled. Six fast balls came down in quick succession and the captain missed them all. Not to be put off he glared at the team and shouted, 'Now that's what you're all doing. Get in there and hit them!' ______________________________________________________________________________________ Michael Clarke called Ricky into his room and said 'We've got some very tough matches coming up,' he said, 'and I wanted to talk to you because we need someone with an Iron nerve, a strong constitution and great skill in the side. That's why I'm asking you to resign.' ---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Salman Butt said to the bowler, 'Give me an easy one, will you? I bet a fellow in the crowd five pounds that I'd score four runs.' The bowler did so and the batsman hit it to the boundary. Straight away, he walked for the pavilion. 'You're not out,' said the bowler, 'Where are you going?' He yelled back: 'I'm going to find the chap who bet me!'
gaurav92 Posted February 23, 2011 Posted February 23, 2011 During the match, A Paki batsman heard a cry from the crowd 'Smith, Smith Your house is on fire!' He dropped his bat and ran off the field, through the crowd and into the road. Breathlessly, he pounded along and then stopped. 'Why am I running?' he said. 'My name's not Smith!'
DomainK Posted February 23, 2011 Author Posted February 23, 2011 It's a lovely day here at Lord's. Pakistan have won the toss and decided to bet.
DomainK Posted February 23, 2011 Author Posted February 23, 2011 Shoaib Akhtar has been invited to participate in Master Chef as it’s believed he can make a meal out of practically anything.
DomainK Posted February 23, 2011 Author Posted February 23, 2011 So Muralitharan has taken 800 test wickets. Isn't it about time they stopped testing him and let him take some real wickets?
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