BREAKING NEWS: Pakistan to launch diplomatic offensive on Lanka

[Rajiv]

Pathological Cricket Board :--D

[Mr. Wicket]

Bravo!

[Guest BossBhai]

-- Removed on request of the user --

[theguyinallblue]

Pakistan chakla Board * - chakla means some red light activity ???

[Centrino]

PCB all set to mount diplomatic offensive on Lanka Alarmed by Srilanka's tour pull out and armed with sufficient material to nail Lanka, the Pathological Cricket Board (PCB) will mount a diplomatic offensive from Monday by convening a two-day closed door meeting in Islamabad with the heads of all foreign countries' missions in the national capital as part of strategy to get Lanka declared as a 'Rogue Cricketing State'. We have learnt from reliable sources that the foreign countries to collaborate with Pakistan would be Iran, Iraq & Afghanistan. Srilankan Sports Minister Gamini Lokuge commented a few days ago that "Srilanka is a responsible country. We are very much a victim of terrorism and security issues ourselves and we will do our best to help Pakistan in this issue". But reports have emerged that recently the Lankan minister has changed his tune markedly. In an interview on CNN IBN, the Lankan minister was heard saying "While we sympathize with what is going on in Pakistan, we cannot be held responsible for the deeds and words of non-state actors. Arjuna Ranatunga is no longer in Srilanka. We cannot be held responsible for what he committed to Pakistan". This came as a shock to many Pakistani cricket lovers. "After a hard day at weapons and grenade training in the heat of Waziristan, Inshallah, cricket was our only entertainment. Refusing to play cricket in Pakistan is haraam. Now we need to revert to playing grenade danda (a popular local game in which kids throw grenades at each other) for fun", says Muhammad Zarkawi, who recently left his home and joined the Harkat-Ul-Ansari movement. Reports suggest that the Jamaat-Ul-Dawa volunteers were recently seen buying buckets of paint & is likely that they have repainted their boards and running under this new name. Meanwhile, Lankan officials seem unflustered by this diplomatic offensive from Pakistan. "We heard that Pakistan has filed a case against us in their local courts. This is a blatant lie on multiple counts. Our understanding is that laws are never enforced in Pakistan and there are no courts there. Recently they even sacked their chief justice. How can we believe this report ? Even if we concede that there are courts in Pakistan, where is the proof to prosecute us ? You cannot claim that someone from Srilanka gave you a go ahead on the tour. That proof wont stand in the court of law. There is no such person called Ranatunga in Lanka, he does not live here". PCB blamed Lanka's unstable cricketing body for the mess. "Lanka is a split country. Their power dynamics is complex. Their cricketing board is just a token body. The real power is with their govt. Therefore there is no point in blaming their cricket board. We will take this to the Internatinal Cricketing Council. We have proof beyond doubt that Ranatunga is from Srilanka". In the mean time reports have emerged that Pakistan may go to war with Srilanka. That would be the first war of its kind, if it happens. Pakistani officials are trying to tackle this problem using diplomatic means. Mansoor Akhtar, a Professor at Lahore University has suggested an innovative idea. "Let us implement an mutual exchange program, as its done in academic circles. Pakistan will send suicide bombers from local jihadi movements in exchange for LTTE suicide bombers. We can achieve enough mutual destruction without the hassles of a war". While this is a stretch, Pakistani govt is not rulling any option out. "At this point all options are open", says Pakistani foreign minister Quereshi. Nevertheless, the events in the ensuing days hold the key for the stability of the region. Watch this space for more. :--D

Is this real???

[DomainK]

:hysterical: :hysterical: :hysterical: :hysterical: :hysterical: :hysterical:

[cochise]

Nice one Bumper! You da man! :cantstop:

[fineleg]

You must post this at padosi site bumper, they'll surely be like "How can he(bumper) slap? How can he slap?" :D

[King Tendulkar]

:adore::adore:

[sandtest]

That is quality stuff!:hatsoff: