punjabiplaya Posted April 12, 2010 Author Posted April 12, 2010 What do you call a woman with a spade up her ass?... I dunno either, but it ain't Dawn French or cheryl cole any more! uk boys will understand more!!
b555 Posted April 13, 2010 Posted April 13, 2010 read this.. http://onion.com/97vRCR not appropriate to post here.. so i thought i better give the link... :hysterical: :hysterical: :hysterical: :hysterical:
punjabiplaya Posted April 13, 2010 Author Posted April 13, 2010 What's the difference between Poland and my pencil case? My pencil case has a ruler.
punjabiplaya Posted April 13, 2010 Author Posted April 13, 2010 Everyone seems to be wondering why paki terrorists are so quick to commit suicide. Let's see: No Christmas, No Jesus, No TV, No cheerleaders, No nude women, No car races, No football, No pork BBQ, No hotdogs, No burgers, No beer, Rags for clothes towels for hats. Constant wailing from the guy in the tower. More than 1 wife. You can't shave, Your wife can't shave, You can't wash off the smell of donkey cooked over burning camel sh*t. Your wife is picked by someone else. She smells worse than your donkey. Then they tell you that when you die it all gets better, sh*t, It couldn't be any worse.!!
gaurav92 Posted April 14, 2010 Posted April 14, 2010 What's the difference between Poland and my pencil case? My pencil case has a ruler. :emc:
punjabiplaya Posted April 14, 2010 Author Posted April 14, 2010 A man and his wife were walking on the streets of Lahore. Coming to a corner a begger shouted out to the lady: "Oh sundari!!! andhha huu. sawa panch rupya de de" (Oh beautiful!! I am blind give me five and a quarter rupees) At once her husband told her: "de de, de de, tujhhe sundari bola hai to har haal me ye andhha hi hai!!" (Give him what he asks, If he thinks you are beautiful then there is no doubt that he is blind!!)
punjabiplaya Posted April 14, 2010 Author Posted April 14, 2010 Q. What do you call a Paki with no sisters? A. A virgin.
punjabiplaya Posted April 14, 2010 Author Posted April 14, 2010 Once there was this man from Pakistan walking through a lonely desert with his camel. For days together he walked alone with his camel in the desert . Being alone for so long a time, he got the urge to make love . Being alone in the sandy desert he had no choice but to make love to his camel. So he tried to make love to the camel. The camel shook him off. He tried again the next day. And the next day too the camel shook him off. So he continued his journey like this trying daily, hoping that the camel will accept him one day. One day he came upon a woman being chased by a gangster. She was crying for help. Our man drew out his sword fought with the gangster and killed him. The woman was so pleased with the man that she told him that she will do anything for him in return for saving her from the gangster. The man immediately asked the beautiful woman, "COULD YOU PLEASE HOLD THE CAMEL FOR ME ".
punjabiplaya Posted April 14, 2010 Author Posted April 14, 2010 News reported today that the Taliban are using sheep to detect mines. They send them into a field and if they're blown up, they have dinner. If they make it through alive, they have a date.
punjabiplaya Posted April 15, 2010 Author Posted April 15, 2010 I gave my girlfriend an orgasm last night. Ungrateful bit*h spat it out....
punjabiplaya Posted April 15, 2010 Author Posted April 15, 2010 Bought me wife a fur coat made out of 3,600 hamster skins and took her to Blackpool... Couldn't get the fecker off the Big Wheel for 2 days
punjabiplaya Posted April 15, 2010 Author Posted April 15, 2010 Hey mate really need your advice for serious problem,I suspected for some time now that the mrs has been cheating,usual signs; phone rings, if i answer they hang up,going out with the girls a lot.. I try to stay awake to look out for her when she comes home but I usually fall asleep,Anyway last night about 12 i hid in the shed behind a motorbike when she came home she got out of some ones car she was buttoning her blouse and she took her panties out of her purse & slipped them on,It was only then i crouched behind the motorbike & noticed it had a hairline crack in the engine mounting bracket.. Is that something I can weld or do I need to replace it ?
punjabiplaya Posted April 16, 2010 Author Posted April 16, 2010 Nurse walks in2 a mental patients room & finds him sittin on the bed pretending 2 drive a truck. 'JOE', she says, 'What ru doin?' 'Cant talk now', Joe says - 'i'm drivin 2 Dublin!' She wishes him a gud trip & goes 2 the nxt room. Here she sees John sittin up in bed w*nking. Shocked, she shouts 'John! Wat ru doin?!' 'Shh!' John says, 'i'm sh*gging Joe's wife while hes in Dublin..'
punjabiplaya Posted April 16, 2010 Author Posted April 16, 2010 Just been outside and got hit on the head by a lasagne,black forest gateaux and mini sausages ......must be the fall out from Iceland !
punjabiplaya Posted April 16, 2010 Author Posted April 16, 2010 What's the difference between the icelandic volcano and cheryl cole? The volcano's still blowing ash!
punjabiplaya Posted April 17, 2010 Author Posted April 17, 2010 A catholic woman goes to see the priest after the birth of her 9th child. "I dont know why i get pregnant so easy" she says "Must be something in the air" "Yes" replies the priest "Your fecking legs"
punjabiplaya Posted April 17, 2010 Author Posted April 17, 2010 The church service was ending & collection had just finished. The priest saw a £50 note in the plate, stopped the service & said 'Whoever put the £50 in, please stand up.' A gay man stood & said 'I did.' The priest told him 'For your generosity I'll let u pick 3 hymns.' Excitedly the gay looked around & said, 'I'll have him, him & him'
punjabiplaya Posted April 17, 2010 Author Posted April 17, 2010 Now that India has allowed homosexuality, the first lesbian couple have got married. So congratulations to Sukme Phlaps and Makemeclit Singh.
Pioneer Posted April 18, 2010 Posted April 18, 2010 What's the difference between Poland and my pencil case? My pencil case has a ruler. :haha::haha::haha:
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