punjabiplaya Posted September 9, 2010 Author Posted September 9, 2010 So there I was lying back on the sofa having a lovely w*nk. And those feckers from DFS called the police.
punjabiplaya Posted September 9, 2010 Author Posted September 9, 2010 Woman weightlifter goes to the doctors and says 'i've been taking steroids and grown a c*ck!' the doc says 'anabolic?' the woman says no, just a c*ck! :haha:
punjabiplaya Posted September 9, 2010 Author Posted September 9, 2010 Car full of Black men pulled up & asked me where the train stn was. "O.K monkey face, turn right at the Cotton Field, past the Hanging Tree left at Rubber Lip Mill & its opposite the Slave Ship Inn". As i lay in the gutter i thought," Thats the last time i eat a bag of Rowntrees Randoms".
kabira Posted September 10, 2010 Posted September 10, 2010 So there I was lying back on the sofa having a lovely w*nk. And those feckers from DFS called the police. who is DFS?
Gunner_Mania Posted September 10, 2010 Posted September 10, 2010 Car full of Black men pulled up & asked me where the train stn was. "O.K monkey face' date=' turn right at the Cotton Field, past the Hanging Tree left at Rubber Lip Mill & its opposite the Slave Ship Inn". As i lay in the gutter i thought," Thats the last time i eat a bag of Rowntrees Randoms".[/quote']
Sachinism Posted September 10, 2010 Posted September 10, 2010 I'm downloading the Qu'ran from an ebook site. I've got a slow connection but it should be done by Saturday 11th I'm putting it on disk, if anyone wants one I can burn a few copies
Sachinism Posted September 10, 2010 Posted September 10, 2010 It's a good thing that Terry Jones cancelled Burn a Koran Day. Doesn't he realise tomorrow is already Bring Your Plane into Work Day?
Dark Warrior Posted September 10, 2010 Posted September 10, 2010 Was asked to go see my Ex-Girlfriend today. One thing led to another and we ended up having sex. police weren't too happy though ... I was only supposed to identify the body
Dark Warrior Posted September 10, 2010 Posted September 10, 2010 I'm downloading the Qu'ran from an ebook site. I've got a slow connection but it should be done by Saturday 11th I'm putting it on disk, if anyone wants one I can burn a few copies :phehehe:
Dark Warrior Posted September 11, 2010 Posted September 11, 2010 A very wise woman once said: Nothing.
Guest Gunner Posted September 13, 2010 Posted September 13, 2010 Was asked to go see my Ex-Girlfriend today. One thing led to another and we ended up having sex. police weren't too happy though ... I was only supposed to identify the body :hysterical::hysterical::hysterical::hysterical::hysterical::hysterical::hysterical::hysterical::hysterical:
punjabiplaya Posted September 13, 2010 Author Posted September 13, 2010 Tiger Woods Wayne Rooney Ashley Cole John Terry Vernon Kay Mark Owen What have they all got in common? Wives who obviously need to make more of a fecking effort
punjabiplaya Posted September 13, 2010 Author Posted September 13, 2010 Not saying Coleen Rooney is as thick as Wayne but when she heard he'd paid £1200 for a 19 year old Escort, she asked if it was taxed and mot'd ! :haha:
punjabiplaya Posted September 13, 2010 Author Posted September 13, 2010 Scientists have crossed a male chicken with an onion and have finally got a white c*ck that brings tears to women's eyes!
punjabiplaya Posted September 14, 2010 Author Posted September 14, 2010 Paddy's dad died & he was On his knees crying.. After 2 mins he gets a phone call and cries louder! His Friend says Whats up now Paddy? Paddy cries My sister just called me, Her dad's died too.
punjabiplaya Posted September 14, 2010 Author Posted September 14, 2010 I was reading in the paper today about this dwarf that got pickpocketed. How the feck could anyone stoop so low?
punjabiplaya Posted September 14, 2010 Author Posted September 14, 2010 What does the ocean say to the boat? Nothing. It just waves.
punjabiplaya Posted September 15, 2010 Author Posted September 15, 2010 I got myself a little puppy today, a jack russel... he's black with a tiny little white patch....so I've decided to call him bradford!
punjabiplaya Posted September 15, 2010 Author Posted September 15, 2010 George Michael's settled well in prison. He's already written a song about his skinhead cell mate.. It'll be his new single: "Hairless Fister".
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