punjabiplaya Posted May 3, 2011 Author Share Posted May 3, 2011 How did they get Osama bin Laden's address? Its not been confirmed yet but its thought he bought a Sony Playstation last month...... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
punjabiplaya Posted May 3, 2011 Author Share Posted May 3, 2011 Coincidentally, an anagram of Osama Bin Laden is "Lob da man in sea" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
punjabiplaya Posted May 4, 2011 Author Share Posted May 4, 2011 A professor at the Auburn University was giving a lecture On Paranormal Studies. To get a feel for his audience, he asks, 'How many people Here believe in ghosts?' About 90 students raise their hands. Well, that's a good start. Out of those who believe in ghosts, Do any of you think you have seen a ghost?' About 40 students raise their hands. That's really good. I'm really glad you take this seriously. Has anyone here ever talked to a ghost?' About 15 students raise their hand. Has anyone here ever touched a ghost?' Three students raise their hands. That's fantastic. Now let me ask you one question further... Have any of you ever made love to a ghost?' Way in the back, Ahmed raises his hand. The professor takes off his glasses and says 'Son, All the years I've been giving this lecture, no one has ever claimed to have made love to a ghost. You've got to come up here and tell us about your Experience.' The Middle Eastern student replied with a nod and a grin, And began to make his way up to the podium. When he reached the front of the room, the professor asks, 'So, Ahmed, tell us what it's like to have sex with a ghost?' Ahmed replied, "Sh*t, from back there I thought you said Goats." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
punjabiplaya Posted May 4, 2011 Author Share Posted May 4, 2011 Bin ladens last words "sh*t! I knew I should have ignored that census" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
punjabiplaya Posted May 4, 2011 Author Share Posted May 4, 2011 The local pub is offering a new drink called The Bin Laden. It's two shots & a splash of water. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
punjabiplaya Posted May 4, 2011 Author Share Posted May 4, 2011 Fwd: Reports are coming in that bin laden had converted to hinduism before he died. Eyewitnesses reported seeing a red dot on his forehead just before he was shot. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
punjabiplaya Posted May 4, 2011 Author Share Posted May 4, 2011 Before today, few people had heard of Abbotabad, similarly with Faisalabad or even Islamabad...but we have known Westhamabad for most of the season... :hysterical: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
punjabiplaya Posted May 4, 2011 Author Share Posted May 4, 2011 .After having a 69 with his bird.. Bob remembered he had a Dentist appointment Afraid they would smell fanny on his breath,he brushed his teeth,used dental floss,a bottle of Listerine & ate a packet of strong mints .Feeling confident in the Dentist's chair,he opened his mouth. The dentist got close & said "Did u have a 69 b4 u got here?". "How did u know" said Bob, "Does my breath smell of fanny?" "No" he replied "U have a skidmark on your forehead Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
punjabiplaya Posted May 4, 2011 Author Share Posted May 4, 2011 NEWS FLASH: Prince Harry reported missing after a fancy dress party in Pakistan. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
punjabiplaya Posted May 4, 2011 Author Share Posted May 4, 2011 Even though we both speak the same language, it's amazing how there are some subtle differences between American-English and proper English: They say "sidewalk" we say "pavement" They say "pants" we say "trousers" They say "buried at sea" we say "naked and chained to a metal bed frame with a car battery connected to his bollocks whilst being beaten for answers" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
punjabiplaya Posted May 5, 2011 Author Share Posted May 5, 2011 Apparently the Irish SAS joined in the US assault over the weekend. They stormed Debenhams after hearing Summer Bed Linen was on the 3rd floor! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
punjabiplaya Posted May 5, 2011 Author Share Posted May 5, 2011 Due to the death of Henry Cooper Audley harrison has now moved 1 place up in the rankings! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
punjabiplaya Posted May 5, 2011 Author Share Posted May 5, 2011 What do Kate Middleton & Osama Bin Laden have in common? Last Sunday they both had their back doors smashed and got shot in the face by a bloke in the Navy.. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Prakat Posted May 6, 2011 Share Posted May 6, 2011 Shaun Tait's girlfriend confirms in Women's Weekly that he has retired from sex so he can focus more on his wanking. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sachin=GOD Posted May 6, 2011 Share Posted May 6, 2011 just seen man city are 17/2 to win the premier league next year. for those of you that don't understand betting, that means if you bet £20.........you will lose £20. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sachin=GOD Posted May 6, 2011 Share Posted May 6, 2011 Shaun Tait's girlfriend confirms in Women's Weekly that he has retired from sex so he can focus more on his wanking. :hysterical: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
punjabiplaya Posted May 6, 2011 Author Share Posted May 6, 2011 Wife 2 Husband: Main Tumhari zindagi Ki Kitab Hu. Husband: Bus Yahi to Afsos Hai. Calendar Hoti to Har Saal Change to Kar Leta. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
punjabiplaya Posted May 6, 2011 Author Share Posted May 6, 2011 The new leader of Al Qaeda has emerged from Dudley and is called " Owamya Bin Keepin" What has more brains than Osama Bin Laden?The wall behind him... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
punjabiplaya Posted May 6, 2011 Author Share Posted May 6, 2011 So I hear they're thinking about making the death of Bin Laden a bank holiday.So come on everybody, sing along, "WE'RE ALL GOING ON OSAMA HOLIDAY!" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
punjabiplaya Posted May 6, 2011 Author Share Posted May 6, 2011 DNA results on Osama have come back showing 27% chocolate, 43% coconut and 30% milk. Apparently he had a large Bounty on his head..... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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