Indian cricket Jokes thread

[coffee_rules]

Time to bring out the best (or worst) on Indian batting/bowling/fielding overseas - 1) What do you call an Indian with 100 by his name? A bowler. 2) Why can't Indians open bottles? Because they don't have any openers. 3) What do you call an Indian with a bottle of champagne in his hand? A waiter. 4) What do you call a world class Indian? Retired. 5)Why is it unfair to call India the second best team over there? Because the Indian women's cricket team are in England as well. 6) What"s the height of optimism? A An Indian batsman putting on sunscreen. 7) What is the main function of the Indian coach? To transport the team from the hotel to the ground. 8) What do Indian batsmen and drug addicts have in common? Both spend most of their time wondering where their next score will come from. 9) What"s the difference between MS Dhoni and a phoenix? At the end of the overseas tour, the phoenix still has a future. (Not in case of MSD) 10) The ICC is investigating strange betting patterns in the Oval Test. Someone allegedly put $20 on India. 11) Why do Indian fielders need pre-tour travel instructions? Because they never catch anything. 12) What did the spectator miss when he went to the toilet? The entire Indian innings. 13)What could Cloudy Anderson be if he was an Indian? An allrounder. 14) What's the Indian version of a hat-trick? Three runs in three balls. 15) What is the most proficient form a footwork displayed by an Indian batsman? The walk back to the pavilion. 16) What is the Indian version of LBW? Lost, beaten, walloped. 17) Why are the Indians demanding increased match payments? Someone has let on that the matches go to a fourth day. (Not True since Old Trafford) 18) Why are Indians asking to keep Maggi to boil before they go batting? ... No guess where these were copied from! YVJ1O3TEOjs Starts of with .... Jab zero diya Mere Bharat ne!