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Posted

Eminem's video for 'Love The Way You Lie' has two huge name actors starring in it. Megan Fox plays a woman stuck in an abusive relationship with Dominic Monaghan. And Dominic Monaghan plays the luckiest bastard in the world.

Posted

The Penis Poem! My nookie days are over! My pilot light is out, what used 2 b my sex appeal is now my water spout! Time was when, on its own from my trousers it would spring, but now its just a full time job 2 find the feckin thing. It used 2 b embarrassing the way it would behave, 4 every single morning it would stand & watch me shave. Now as old age approaches it sure gives me the blues, 2 see it hang its little head & watch me tie my shoes!

Posted

Englishman, German & Jamaican sitting at a swimming pool. Englishman takes out his penis,puts in the water & says "Temp is 32 Centigrade " The German puts his penis in the water & says "Temp is 90Farenhite" Jamaican puts his penis in water & says "I don't know abt the temp but the water is 2ft deep."

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Paddy and Mick are sat in a cafe.A waitress came over and said "You can't eat your own sandwiches in here!" So they swapped. What do you say to a women with two black eyes, Nothing, you already told her twice

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A large woman came into my shop today with her two sons, I said "Are they twins" She said "No, theres a year between them, do you think they look alike then?" I said "No, I just cant believe someone would feck you twice.

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2 gays pakis in an alley, when a policeman arrives. One runs off but the policeman grabs the other. "You dirty bastards. If I'd caught your mate, this truncheon would've gone right up his ass." A voice shouts, "Yoo hoo. I'm in the wheelie bin"!

Posted
Englishman' date=' German & Jamaican sitting at a swimming pool. Englishman takes out his penis,puts in the water & says "Temp is 32 Centigrade " The German puts his penis in the water & says "Temp is 90Farenhite" Jamaican puts his penis in water & says "I don't know abt the temp but the water is 2ft deep."[/quote'] :hysterical::hysterical::hysterical::hysterical::hysterical:
Posted
A large woman came into my shop today with her two sons, I said "Are they twins" She said "No, theres a year between them, do you think they look alike then?" I said "No, I just cant believe someone would feck you twice.
hahaah
Posted
A scientist has invented a bra that stops tits jiggling up & down & nipples sticking out in the cold. His colleagues have kicked his feking head in !
:hysterical:
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Those of you that got your A-level results. If you did well give yourself a pat on the back, you deserve it....And if you didn't do well, I'll have a big mac and a strawberry cornetto mcflurry

Posted

Punjabiplaya, please refrain from posting jokes related to floods/destruction in Pakistan. I know it’s all for fun and games, but there are real people dying and suffering out there.

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