Holysmoke Posted April 6, 2009 Share Posted April 6, 2009 Congrats daisy. I know what you've been through because I've been through it as well. I was diagnosed with moderate to severe depression. I did not take any medication, but I did get rid of it. I'm really happy for you! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
flamy Posted April 6, 2009 Share Posted April 6, 2009 Desi bhai :isalute: I :heart: desi. :sex: ? Congrats ass and get the fudge out of ICF and spend some time with your wife. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Desi Cartman Posted April 6, 2009 Author Share Posted April 6, 2009 Desi bhai :isalute: I :heart: desi. :sex: ? Congrats ass and get the fudge out of ICF and spend some time with your wife. :woot: Tbh ICF played a big role , I used to get super bored at work but now I spend time on ICF at work and day passes quicker ! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Desi Cartman Posted April 6, 2009 Author Share Posted April 6, 2009 Congrats daisy. I know what you've been through because I've been through it as well. I was diagnosed with moderate to severe depression. I did not take any medication' date=' but I did get rid of it. I'm really happy for you![/quote'] Thanks! I had acute depression and anxiety .. Al though I think think severity matters , at the end of the day u know how it feels ...but then again it was a learning experience , I realized why people become religious , why are some relative so weird etc Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fineleg Posted April 6, 2009 Share Posted April 6, 2009 Congratulations desi. This is a great achievement. I was surprised to hear you had depression, but am really glad you have overcome this. Congratulations to your family as well. Like dsr said here, it is indeed a very different life online and in real life for at least some folks if not all. Its like T20 and Test cricket, one is tamasha and the other is the real deal, and it takes a lot of attributes to be successful in real life. Also, looks like ICF helped you to vent and rejoice as well. Glad that an online forum could give you some support also. We expect to see the bhangra (amits like video) from you now :D Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
flamy Posted April 6, 2009 Share Posted April 6, 2009 What is depression? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lurker Posted April 6, 2009 Share Posted April 6, 2009 Good on you Desi! Congrats and good luck man. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Desi Cartman Posted April 7, 2009 Author Share Posted April 7, 2009 Congratulations desi. This is a great achievement. I was surprised to hear you had depression, but am really glad you have overcome this. Congratulations to your family as well. Like dsr said here, it is indeed a very different life online and in real life for at least some folks if not all. Its like T20 and Test cricket, one is tamasha and the other is the real deal, and it takes a lot of attributes to be successful in real life. Also, looks like ICF helped you to vent and rejoice as well. Glad that an online forum could give you some support also. We expect to see the bhangra (amits like video) from you now :D actually I have been doing well for more than a year now and maybe thats why no one noticed but I think I mentioned it once or twice in my posts about me suffering from depression. I never hide it but its just that I m a phunny guy and its very difficult to explain Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Desi Cartman Posted April 7, 2009 Author Share Posted April 7, 2009 What is depression? :banghead: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kohum Posted April 7, 2009 Share Posted April 7, 2009 Desi - You are lucky indeed. I didn't know depression could have this much of an issue. Stay well and stay put - good luck !! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Desi Cartman Posted April 7, 2009 Author Share Posted April 7, 2009 Congrats Desi!Great achievement ......You are lucky you realised you needed help...and luckier still to have a wife who understood you and your problem.She seems to be a real strong lady. I also suffered from depression post delivery.But it was only pregnancy related.A lot of women suffer from that. And I hope that last visit to the doctor is not to give you a really big bill....:winky: Chal...aish karo.....!:icflove: yep your depression is very common ... as for the expense , govt here covers all consulting charges in govt hospitals but I went to a pvt hospital and paid may be $700-800 a year from my pocket & the govt put in twice of that. I'm lucky that could afford it ... it was money spent well :two_thumbs_up: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Desi Cartman Posted April 7, 2009 Author Share Posted April 7, 2009 Desi - You are lucky indeed. I didn't know depression could have this much of an issue. Stay well and stay put - good luck !! its not much of a problem , it just makes you kill yourself :P Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Desi Cartman Posted April 7, 2009 Author Share Posted April 7, 2009 Well done. Shocked you suffered depression. Just shows how little we know of what people are really like in the real world rather then their internet personas Well done for recovering. Glad to hear all is well now you guys dont know about it since I was already doing better when I joined ICF Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Desi Cartman Posted April 7, 2009 Author Share Posted April 7, 2009 How could you get out of it reading fineleg's posts on ICF? Its called shock treatment :hysterical: Congrats and may you get the strength to overcome it completely and forever Thanks ... still a long way to go I guess Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DomainK Posted April 7, 2009 Share Posted April 7, 2009 Its called shock treatment :hysterical: Thanks ... still a long way to go I guess :hysterical::hysterical::hysterical::hysterical::hysterical::hysterical::hysterical::hysterical: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Desi Cartman Posted April 7, 2009 Author Share Posted April 7, 2009 I can relate to that Although I was born in India, I spent most of my life overseas, far away from my grandparents, uncles / aunts, extended family members etc Sometimes, I feel very alone and homesick. Lighting fire crackers and spending Diwali with family is one thing and sending them an electronic greeting card is something else. It is such an empty feeling and no amount of materialistic desires can satisfy the urge to spend some personal 1 on 1 time with the people closest to you I didn't pay much attention at that time, but looking back, these are the moments I want to re live again and again Everyone is busy with their lives. Everybody goes their seperate ways. It is really sad. Looking at old photos brings back so many memories. Just feel like sitting and crying. I know it feels bad but the worst is when you return "home" and it doesnt feel like home anymore .. TBH I cant call India home anymore .. I dont feel at ease in India now ... but Im still an alien here I guess Im dhobi ka kutta .. na ghar ka na ghaat ka :blink: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rajiv Posted April 7, 2009 Share Posted April 7, 2009 Desi, so it seems you were depressed at a sub-conscious level aka missing your family My depression was the last time I went to India - don't ask me what but the smell, the surrounding was like weird ( almost like I was guilty of things )..moment I came back to Canada, I was fine I was prescribed some pills, I took it for like 3 days but you know what - it was like just the though of taking the pills made me fine, I took as aspirin by accident and I felt fine..so it kinda hurt me like a bindaas person like me has depression..so I fought it Did u goto a regular doc or psch? congrats as depression is nothing but a silent killer Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Desi Cartman Posted April 7, 2009 Author Share Posted April 7, 2009 A BIGGG Congrats to Desi man for overcoming his problems.. As with any personal problem, medicines and external help can only do so much.. Ultimately, its the individual who has the win the battle because there is one else in this world who understands his or her problems better than the person itself.. A big Kudos to your wife too for standing by your side through all this! yes , treatment has 3 parts * medication/doctor : required to stop you from killing yourself , helps sleeping, eating , above all it helps you be in a state where you can look for ways to tackle depression * Motivation : this comes from family background, your goals , how much you read about depression and become aware so you know where to seek help * Family, friends and work : Its important that u have at least few close friends who know your condition and are there to help you. Sometimes u gotta call your friends at 3am to tell them that u r sweating and crying ... If your manager is good at work then that also helps , in my case I had a wonderful manager for years who actually used to call me everyday to wake me up and remind me of meetings and tell me its ok if I'm late or skip meetings :two_thumbs_up: All this gives the patient time to understand how to deal with depression. I dont think it ever gets cured , its that the patient learns trick to deal with it without medication and without much impact on daily life. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
flamy Posted April 7, 2009 Share Posted April 7, 2009 What is depression? :banghead: No, really. I don't understand it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Desi Cartman Posted April 7, 2009 Author Share Posted April 7, 2009 No' date=' really. I don't understand it.[/quote'] this is depression At some point while suffering with severe depression, I began to start thinking about death. Death I eventually began to believe as being the only option available to me to rid myself of the pain I was experiencing. Of course, I now know that it is not the only option, but I sincerely believed that it was at the time. The death fantasy that those who suffer with severe depression begin to experience had pounced on me and was starting to cloud and distort my mind. There wasn’t a day that passed that I wasn’t thinking about death in one way or another. At first, I had simple thoughts. What would my funeral be like? Who would attend it? But over time, these thoughts became more isolated and the questions I began to ask myself started to turn into images in my mind. I could actually picture myself following through with suicide. I would question how easy it would be to kill myself? Could I just step out off the pavement into the road and in front of oncoming traffic? Could I jump from a bridge? Could I hang myself or poison myself? Which of these methods would be the quickest, the least painful? Of course, I knew what I was thinking wasn’t right. I knew I should not be torturing myself with this type of thought, but I couldn’t stop myself, I couldn’t help myself and I started to think about things more deeply. How long would it be before someone noticed I wasn’t around? How long would it take for my body to be found? The worst times were when I was sat alone, at home with nothing on TV, no-one to talk to and no-one around that could distract me or talk some degree of sense back into me. If I went to the kitchen to make a sandwich, I was troubled when I picked a knife out of the cutlery drawer and began considering how I could use it to slit my wrists. I only ever made my sandwich and never became a self-harmer, but the thoughts were there, the death fantasy always lingering in my mind, in my daily routines, ready to pounce on me if things got too tough, if I found I was unable to cope with something. It’s like it became an opt-out ‘option’ there if I needed it. I started to question if this type of thinking meant that I was crazy? Maybe I wasn’t right in the head; maybe I actually was a loony or a psycho? For certainly any ‘normal person’ wouldn’t be thinking about death, wouldn’t be as fixated on it as me? Many people think that suicide attempts are a ‘cry for help’ but I can categorically say that they are not necessarily that. Depression distorts the mind so much that all a person can think about is the negativity in their lives and a way out of the pain - death. They hate to feel sad, to feel depressed, to feel as thought they are unable to function. No-one that suffers with depression wants to feel the way that they do and it is a very scary thing to find yourself contemplating your own death in your mind. Thankfully, I managed to get myself into my GP’s practise. But the fear of telling a professional the type of thoughts that you are thinking is huge. I worried that I would be sectioned, worried that I would be thrown into a straight jacket and dismissed as crazy in a mental institution. The courage that I had to find to discuss what was happening in my head was immense. However, it took strength, courage and a strong belief in that I was doing the right thing to help myself. And the advice I would give anyone else who may be suffering depression and in a similar position to that which I was in is to seek the help, to talk to someone, to try to do something before considering the only option that you think is available to you. Because death isn’t your only option - you can get better and have a life depression free. I am living proof. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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