punjabiplaya Posted July 24, 2012 Author Posted July 24, 2012 Two girls at schools, ones really posh and the other ones a bit of a slapper. The teacher one day asks them to create a sentence using the the inproper. So the posh one says 'the day my father was digging up potatoes in our garden using a spade was inproper. He should have used a fork. The teacher then asks the other girl and she replied 'last night my boy friend was shag*ing me hard. When his balls were slapping on my pink ars*hole, thats when i knew he was inproper!
punjabiplaya Posted July 24, 2012 Author Posted July 24, 2012 I walked up to a woman in a club last night and said, 'Excuse me, do you work at subway' 'No, what makes you think that?' she replied 'Because you have just give me a footlong.' I said :hysterical::hysterical::hysterical:
Crookbond Posted July 25, 2012 Posted July 25, 2012 Whats The Saddest Part Of Sholay? Ek Toh Thakur Ki Biwi Nahi Thi! Upar Se Gabbar Ne Uske Dono Hath Kat Diye! =D =D
maniac Posted July 25, 2012 Posted July 25, 2012 Whats The Saddest Part Of Sholay? Ek Toh Thakur Ki Biwi Nahi Thi! Upar Se Gabbar Ne Uske Dono Hath Kat Diye! =D =D :haha:
suraj Posted July 26, 2012 Posted July 26, 2012 Whats The Saddest Part Of Sholay? Ek Toh Thakur Ki Biwi Nahi Thi! Upar Se Gabbar Ne Uske Dono Hath Kat Diye! =D =D :hysterical::hysterical::hysterical::hysterical::hysterical::hysterical::hysterical:
Utalk Posted July 26, 2012 Posted July 26, 2012 Paki dies and goes to hell. The Devil shows him 3 doors, "choose one and you'll spend eternity there." Paki looks behind door 1, boiling water was dripping from the ceiling, 2nd has hot coals on the floor to walk on, 3rd door has an old man getting a blowjob from a busty naked blonde. Being smart, the paki says, "I'll take door 3." Devil taps the blonde on the shoulder, "You can go now, the pakis taking over!" :haha: Hate you. You couldn't resist could you? Lame by your standards.
1983-2011 Posted July 26, 2012 Posted July 26, 2012 Hate you. You couldn't resist could you? Lame by your standards. normally its Paddy with this joke but people change it suite their humor
1983-2011 Posted July 26, 2012 Posted July 26, 2012 "I'm sorry I'm home late mum," says Alan, "I got detention for not paying attention in class." "Oh Alan," she replies, "how many times do I have to tell you this? I'm not your mum, and you live next door."
1983-2011 Posted July 26, 2012 Posted July 26, 2012 So an eleven year old boy managed to travel all the way to Rome by himself? He must be very brave going that close to the Vatican.
1983-2011 Posted July 26, 2012 Posted July 26, 2012 After moving into my new house, I walked up and down the street informing all the neighbours I was a repeat sex offender. Hopefully, that will keep their kids off my ****ing lawn.
punjabiplaya Posted July 26, 2012 Author Posted July 26, 2012 Hate you. You couldn't resist could you? Lame by your standards. i havent seen u on the jokes thread bro thought might make you say hi...:winky: yeah was q lame ...but wasnt nasty...:--D
punjabiplaya Posted July 26, 2012 Author Posted July 26, 2012 As me and the wife headed off on a romantic holiday we talked about what kinky things we'd like to do to each other. She said, "I've always wanted to be handcuffed." So I planted a kilo of coke in her suitcase
punjabiplaya Posted July 26, 2012 Author Posted July 26, 2012 Why Studying Is Better Than Sex 10. You can usually find someone to do it with. 9. If you get tired, you can stop, save your place and pick up where you left off. 8. You can finish early without feelings of guilt or shame. 7. When you open a book, you don't have to worry about who else has opened it. 6. A little coffee and you can do it all night. 5. If you don't finish a chapter you won't gain a reputation as a "book teaser." 4. You can do it, eat and watch T.V. all at the same time. 3. You don't get embarrassed if your parents interrupt you in the middle. 2. You don't have to put your beer down to do it. 1. If you aren't sure what you're doing, you can always ask your roommate for help.
punjabiplaya Posted July 26, 2012 Author Posted July 26, 2012 A guy with a black eye boards his plane bound for Pittsburgh and sits down in his seat. He notices immediately that the guy next to him has a black eye, too. He says to him, "Hey, this is a coincidence, we both have black eyes; mind if I ask how you got yours?" The other guy says, "Well, it just happened, it was a tongue twister accident. See, I was at the ticket counter and this gorgeous blonde with the most massive breasts in the world was there. So, instead of saying, 'I'd like two tickets to Pittsburgh,' I accidentally said, 'I'd like two pickets to Tittsburgh'....so she socked me a good one." The first guy replied, "Wow! This is unbelievable. Mine was a tongue-twister too. I was at the breakfast table and I wanted to say to my wife, "Please pour me a bowl of Frosties, honey.' But I accidentally said, 'You have ruined my life you evil, self-centered, fat-assed bi*ch.' :hysterical:
Crookbond Posted July 27, 2012 Posted July 27, 2012 When Rajesh Khanna, Jagjit Singh & Dev Anand died News channels Played their Videos....I just wonder what will happen When Sunny Leone dies.. :hmmm:
1983-2011 Posted July 28, 2012 Posted July 28, 2012 Having watched the opening ceremony, I must say... I've seen better Bond girls.
1983-2011 Posted July 28, 2012 Posted July 28, 2012 I was watching a porn video last night and accidentally shared it with Facebook. My ex-girlfriend still can't see how I managed to accidentally transfer it to the laptop from my video camera, accidentally click the 'add video' button and accidentally tag her in it, but these things happen.
1983-2011 Posted July 28, 2012 Posted July 28, 2012 "Where do you want this big roll of bubble wrap?" I asked my boss. "Just pop it in the corner," he said. It took me three hours.
Crookbond Posted July 29, 2012 Posted July 29, 2012 Why indian girls are not good in sports? Only 10% are playing cricket, hockey, tennis, badminton, chess, etc! Remaining 90% are busy in playing with "Janu" janu kaha ho? janu kya kar rahe ho? janu kab aaoge? janu u love me na? Janu kiske saath ho? Janu muje ye chahiye janu movie chale. Janu ye kya hai? Janu kya kiya din bhar? Janu u miss me? Janu kuch to bolo? Janu i miss u janu yeh janu wo Janu kuch nahi "Jaan le lo jaanu ki" bechara janu.
adi B Posted July 29, 2012 Posted July 29, 2012 I walked in on my nan sucking my grandads co*k. I thought thats fecking disgusting' date=' it really should have been cremated with the rest of him[/quote'] :hysterical::hysterical::hysterical::hysterical::hysterical::hysterical::hysterical::hysterical::hysterical:
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