punjabiplaya Posted April 7, 2010 Author Posted April 7, 2010 Paddy gets a letter in the post this morning, it lands on the floor, it says on the envelope DO NOT BEND. He's stil wondering how he's going to pick it up
punjabiplaya Posted April 7, 2010 Author Posted April 7, 2010 Just seen a paki buying aftershave in boots! Seemed a bit pointless really...... like spraying fabreeze on dog shi*t!
punjabiplaya Posted April 7, 2010 Author Posted April 7, 2010 I was standing in a queue behind a fat woman with a huge **** when her phone started bleeping.. A little boy behind her said "feck me she's reversing!!"
punjabiplaya Posted April 7, 2010 Author Posted April 7, 2010 Mr Singh has 5 sons named... Parvinder Singh Sukvinder Singh, Getupter Singh, Kuldip Singh, Bulvinder Singh Wen 6th son was born Singh's wife insisted to name him... BAS-KAR-SINGH.
punjabiplaya Posted April 7, 2010 Author Posted April 7, 2010 Paddy O'Reilly, the Irish world middleweight boxing champion, goes for a stringent medical. After a two hour wait the doctor calls paddy back into his surgery and says "paddy, youve got sugar diabetes!!" paddy looks at him and says "Ok, when do i fight the black b*stard?"
Jadoo Posted April 8, 2010 Posted April 8, 2010 Just seen a paki buying aftershave in boots! Seemed a bit pointless really...... like spraying fabreeze on dog shi*t! :hysterical::hysterical::hysterical::hysterical: Quality P, keep it coming
punjabiplaya Posted April 8, 2010 Author Posted April 8, 2010 A robber walks into a bank, "Freeze! Give me all your cash!" Innocent man stands up and pulls off robbers mask. He shouts, 'I've seen your face now!' So the robber shoots him! "Anyone else seen my face?" Silence for a moment, then someone pipes up, 'l think that Paki in the corner got a glimpse...!' :hysterical::hysterical:
punjabiplaya Posted April 8, 2010 Author Posted April 8, 2010 Bloke goes into pub nd asks for 3 double whiskeys. '' U OK?'' asks the barman. ''NO, I've just found out my youngest son is gay' The nxt week he goes in and asks for 6 double whiskeys. '' U OK?'' asks the barman again. ''NO, I've just found out my eldest son is gay aswell'. Week after he returns to the pub and asks for 13 doubles. '' FECK ME' says the barman '' Does any of your family like fanny?' ' Yep ' he replies,''The wife"!
Laaloo Posted April 8, 2010 Posted April 8, 2010 There were three men going on a coach journey. 1 was white, 1 was black and the other was a Paki durin' da journey the black was eatin' some food from his country. Half way through eatin', he chucked it out da window. The white man looked at him and asked "Why you chuckin it out?" The black man replied "I've got plenty in my country." The Paki man was then eatin' a chapati from his country. Halfway through eatin' he chucked it out of da window. The white man asked " Why u chuckin' that away?" The Paki man replied "I've got plenty in my country" The white man chucked the Paki man out of the window. The black man asked "Why you chuckin' him out?" The white man replied "I've got plenty in my country!!"
Laaloo Posted April 8, 2010 Posted April 8, 2010 The news reported today that there has been a powerful earthquake in Pakistan last night, measuring 9.2 on the Richter scale. A reported 335,000 Pakastanis are confirmed dead and another 239,000 are missing. The world is horrified by the event, and are rushing to aid Pakistan. The United States is sending 10 billion dollars immediately with more expected to follow The United Kingdom is sending food, clothing, and supplies to aid the suffering citizens. Canada is sending 500,000 replacement Pakistanis.
Laaloo Posted April 8, 2010 Posted April 8, 2010 An insect falls into a mug of beer... Englishman : Throws his mug away and walks out American : Takes the insect out and drinks the beer Chinese : Eats the insect and throws the beer away Indian : Sells the beer to the American and insect to the Chinese and gets a new mug of beer. Pakistani : Accuses the Indian for throwing insect into his beer, relates the issue to Kashmir, asks the Chinese for Military aid, takes a loan from the American to buy one more mug of beer.
Laaloo Posted April 8, 2010 Posted April 8, 2010 Banta was in the army. During the war with Pakistan, Banta used his intelligence to kill many Pakistani soldiers. He would hide behind the bushes and shout Pakistani names like - Imran Khan etc. and the soldier named Imran Khan would get up to say "I am here !" Then Banta would shoot him down. This went on till Banta almost wiped out all the soldiers single handedly! Suddenly the Pakistani commander realized that Banta was killing all his soldiers by fooling them. So he decides to use Banta's own method to kill him and starts calling him names like Banta etc. Banta realizing that the Pakistani was using his trick, suddenly says "Who called me?" and the Commander gets up to say "I called you." Banta shoots him down!
punjabiplaya Posted April 8, 2010 Author Posted April 8, 2010 Banta was in the army. During the war with Pakistan, Banta used his intelligence to kill many Pakistani soldiers. He would hide behind the bushes and shout Pakistani names like - Imran Khan etc. and the soldier named Imran Khan would get up to say "I am here !" Then Banta would shoot him down. This went on till Banta almost wiped out all the soldiers single handedly! Suddenly the Pakistani commander realized that Banta was killing all his soldiers by fooling them. So he decides to use Banta's own method to kill him and starts calling him names like Banta etc. Banta realizing that the Pakistani was using his trick, suddenly says "Who called me?" and the Commander gets up to say "I called you." Banta shoots him down! :hysterical: GOOD ONE LAALOO PAAJI
punjabiplaya Posted April 11, 2010 Author Posted April 11, 2010 Went to the doctors for the first time in ages the other day. It was a new female doctor, she was young and drop dead gorgeous. I groaned, oh no, I'm so embarrassed. She said don't worry I'm a professional, I've seen it all, just tell me what's wrong and i will help you in any way i can. . I said I think my c*ck tastes funny.
punjabiplaya Posted April 11, 2010 Author Posted April 11, 2010 Q: How does a cricket commentator describe a nude girl? A: There is no cover, no extra cover, no slip, but 2 silly points & 2 fine legs, a deep gully... and little grass on the pitch will be wee bit wet after overnight rain. Any way, it's going to be a fine batting pitch. Good for googlies and better for finger spinners.
gaurav92 Posted April 12, 2010 Posted April 12, 2010 Q: How does a cricket commentator describe a nude girl? A: There is no cover' date=' no extra cover, no slip, but 2 silly points & 2 fine legs, a deep gully... and little grass on the pitch will be wee bit wet after overnight rain. Any way, it's going to be a fine batting pitch. Good for googlies and better for finger spinners.[/quote'] :hysterical::hysterical::hysterical::hysterical::hysterical::hysterical::hysterical:
urbestfriend Posted April 12, 2010 Posted April 12, 2010 Q: How does a cricket commentator describe a nude girl? A: There is no cover' date=' no extra cover, no slip, but 2 silly points & 2 fine legs, a deep gully... and little grass on the pitch will be wee bit wet after overnight rain. Any way, it's going to be a fine batting pitch. Good for googlies and better for finger spinners.[/quote'] :haha::haha:
punjabiplaya Posted April 12, 2010 Author Posted April 12, 2010 Sardar ji was late for a important meeting. Not able to finding a parking spot, he looked up towards heaven & said, "Waheguru ji, take pity on me. If you find me a parking spot I will go to Gurdwara every Sunday for the rest of my life & give up daaru. "Miraculously a parking spot appeared. Sardar-ji looked up again & said, "Never mind Waheguru ji, I've found one...
Recommended Posts