punjabiplaya Posted March 18, 2011 Author Posted March 18, 2011 In a joint venture the BBC and Disney are producing a documentary about the life of an average birmingham family..... Its called 101 Damn asians!
punjabiplaya Posted March 19, 2011 Author Posted March 19, 2011 Mr Cadbury met Miss Rowntree on a Double Decker. It was just After Eight. They got off at Quality Street. He asked her name. 'Polo, i'm the one with the hole' she said with a Wispa. 'i'm Marathon, the one with the nuts' he replied. He touched her Cream Eggs then slipped his hand into her Snickers. He fondled her Flap Jacks and she rubbed his Tic Tacs. It was a Fab moment as she screamed in Turkish Delight. But 3 days later his Sherbert Dip Dab started to itch. Turns out miss rowntree had been with bertie basset and he had allsorts!
punjabiplaya Posted March 19, 2011 Author Posted March 19, 2011 My wife reckons she can tell how good a film is by how many tissues she goes through when watching it. Funnily enough, I have a similar system myself! :hysterical::hysterical::hysterical:
Laaloo Posted March 20, 2011 Posted March 20, 2011 My wife reckons she can tell how good a film is by how many tissues she goes through when watching it. Funnily enough, I have a similar system myself! :hysterical::hysterical::hysterical: :hysterical::hysterical::hysterical::hysterical::hysterical::hysterical:
Guest Gunner Posted March 20, 2011 Posted March 20, 2011 My wife reckons she can tell how good a film is by how many tissues she goes through when watching it. Funnily enough, I have a similar system myself! :hysterical::hysterical::hysterical: :hysterical::hysterical::hysterical::hysterical::hysterical::hysterical::hysterical::hysterical::hysterical::hysterical::hysterical::hysterical::hysterical::hysterical::hysterical::hysterical::hysterical::hysterical::hysterical::hysterical::hysterical:
gaurav92 Posted March 21, 2011 Posted March 21, 2011 My wife reckons she can tell how good a film is by how many tissues she goes through when watching it. Funnily enough, I have a similar system myself! :hysterical::hysterical::hysterical: :haha:
Sid Posted March 21, 2011 Posted March 21, 2011 My wife reckons she can tell how good a film is by how many tissues she goes through when watching it. Funnily enough, I have a similar system myself! :hysterical::hysterical::hysterical: :hysterical::hysterical::hysterical::hysterical:
punjabiplaya Posted March 21, 2011 Author Posted March 21, 2011 TIP FOR THE DAY. Don't sh*g a dwarf with learning difficulties. It aint big and it aint clever.
punjabiplaya Posted March 21, 2011 Author Posted March 21, 2011 esp for gunner!!!!!!!!!!!! If a long condom goes on a long pri*k, and a short condom goes on a short pri*k what would u put on a thick pri*k?....... A TOTTENHAM SHIRT
punjabiplaya Posted March 21, 2011 Author Posted March 21, 2011 Paddy loses his dog, he's inconsolable, his wife says he should put an ad in the paper , So he does. 2 weeks pass and not a word , paddy's wife asks "what did u say in the ad " paddy replies " HERE BOY
punjabiplaya Posted March 21, 2011 Author Posted March 21, 2011 Paddy caught his wife having an affair so decided to kill her & himself. He puts a gun to his head, looks at his wife & says dont laugh you're feckin next!
punjabiplaya Posted March 21, 2011 Author Posted March 21, 2011 Had a German plumber in the other day. He accidentally connected the gas supply to the shower. Old habits die hard eh?
punjabiplaya Posted March 21, 2011 Author Posted March 21, 2011 ITALIAN : When I afinish making alove to my girlafriend I go down and gently tickle the back of her knees ana she floats 6 inches above da bed in ecstasy! FRENCHMAN : Zat is nothing, when I finish with ze girl ah kiss her all ze way down her body and zen lick ze soles of ze feet she float 10 inches above ze bed in ecstasy. Englishman: When I'm finished sha*gin me bird I wipe me nob on the curtains and she hits the feckin' roof!!
punjabiplaya Posted March 21, 2011 Author Posted March 21, 2011 In an effort to be more slu*ty, the Missus told me 2 sit back and watch, as she shoved a lollipop up her pussy and started masturbating. I said "That's lovely darling, but won't you need that tomorrow to help get those children across the road?"
punjabiplaya Posted March 21, 2011 Author Posted March 21, 2011 Man has a £50 note tattooed on his willy. His wife says, ''Why have you done that?'' He replies, ''For 1, l like to see my money grow; 2, I like to play with my money; 3, l like having money in my hand; and last but not least, next time you want 2 blow fifty quid, you can stay at home to do it!''
punjabiplaya Posted March 21, 2011 Author Posted March 21, 2011 Paddy is baffled by his orange co*k. The Doctor asks him "does anyone else in your family have this condition?" Paddy says "no" "do you handle any chemicals at work?" "I dont work" he replies. "well what do you do all day?!" the doctor asks. Paddy says "watch porn and eat Wotsits"
Sachinism Posted March 22, 2011 Posted March 22, 2011 So, X-rated websites have been given the approval to have the XXX domain name? Surely this is going to confuse the Americans when they are shopping for clothes online.
Sachinism Posted March 22, 2011 Posted March 22, 2011 My wife told me if she ever won the Lottery she wouldn't give me a penny and she'd move out of the country. Little does she know I've been using the same numbers as her for 5 years. That'll wipe the smile off her fat face
punjabiplaya Posted March 22, 2011 Author Posted March 22, 2011 I told the wife that i kept gettin a burnin sensation in my ar*e + didnt know wat it was. She sed 'ring sting'. I sed 'wat makes u think he'll fekin know?'
punjabiplaya Posted March 22, 2011 Author Posted March 22, 2011 Theres a debate in the middle east about whether or not the flintstones should be shown on tv. The people in dubai dont understand the humour, but the people in abi dabi doo! :haha:
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