DesiChap Posted June 19, 2007 Share Posted June 19, 2007 :hysterical::hysterical::hysterical: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dhondy Posted June 19, 2007 Author Share Posted June 19, 2007 You took "Harry-ness" to a new level there, GIB! No way am I sitting next to you in a train!:hysterical: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
apocalypse Posted June 19, 2007 Share Posted June 19, 2007 great ones everyone :hysterical: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
theguyinallblue Posted June 19, 2007 Share Posted June 19, 2007 now i use train wash basin for such things...now i am more civilized.. so no need to be so paranoid.. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dhondy Posted June 19, 2007 Author Share Posted June 19, 2007 Don't take it personally, Sandy. It takes years to perfect spitting accurately. It's an art on par with Raag Malhar, Raag Darbara, etc. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
King Posted June 19, 2007 Share Posted June 19, 2007 Lurker's barnstormer of an experience at the doctor's surgery and Donny's lovely cricketing snippets made me long for a thread where we could all share humorous moments of our own with others. Here's one of mine. This also involves a doctor, in this case one of my colleagues, who is a physician. During the course of a day's work, he came across a rather old gentleman, who was having difficulty passing water. My colleague figured that he might have an enlarged prostate, and took great pains to explain in a rather loud voice to the somewhat deaf gentleman that he would have to perform a "per-rectal" examination on him. He explained that this involved getting the patient to lie on one side, and putting a finger up his back passage to look for abnormalities. When my colleague had put on a pair of gloves and turned around, the patient was ready, lying on his side....and with a finger stuck up his own ass. :hysterical::hysterical::hysterical: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Zap_Brannigan Posted June 20, 2007 Share Posted June 20, 2007 This is not really funny but this is all i can remember right now. Happened during the India-Pak game(anwars 194),which was the 1st international game i watched live. Everyone knows how hot madras can get and how long the queue to enter a cricket game in India could get. So,me,my brother and uncle went much ahead of time and stood in the blazing sun a for a few hours before we could enter the stadium. All that to see Anwar pummeling kumble. Meanwhile, in the front row, a middle aged couple and their teen daughter with a rather freakishly bad and garish make up, were annoying us with their constant talk about their personal life and crap. They were so loud that everyone within a 10 feet radius heard what they were talking about. Apparently,they got their tickets free from the dads boss and they weren't interested in cricket. The only reason they were their was to make a good family impression on his boss. We could all see that he was over eager to do that. To make things worse, his boss was MIA for over half the match. During one of their many silly arguments between them, the mom said "I dont think your boss is gonna make it. Maybe we should leave". Just as the words left her mouth, i shot out an instant "Please do". Everyone close to me and was annoyed by this family heard it too and started out laughing. I guess that put the family in an enbarrising situation and they never opened their mouth the boss made it. Another not so funny one.My first directorial venture. A school play. Rather,just for my class. I overestimated the intelligence of an average indian teen and decided to make a sherlock holmes play. Unfortunately some things came in between and we never rehearsed properly.So we decided just to go ahead with it and give a damn about how good it is which included a lot of impromptu lines. I played the villian in the play and my best friend played holmes. So apart from the many personal jibes we took at each other, we couldn't keep oursleves from laughin out silly in the middle of lines.Meanwhile, the whole crowd was confused and bored. They didn't know whether it was a comedy show or a mystery play. Frankly,neither did we. In the middle of the play, i decided that i had enough and said to holmes.."If you are so good, why dont you just solve the crime" or something like that. Sherlock got the clue and said "Aha, i know who did it". Me obviously being the villain, said out "Too bad". Even after everything had happened Shelock wasn't ready for a confession and started out laughing. Now watson completely clued in on what was happening chimed in with a "No,it was me". And then one by one,everyone else claimed to be the culprit. The crowd?? Not a clue on what was goin on Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dhondy Posted June 20, 2007 Author Share Posted June 20, 2007 The second one was funnier.:haha: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CC1981 Posted June 20, 2007 Share Posted June 20, 2007 ROTFLMAO @ Dhondy's opening post..i've never laughed so hard in years! Thank you,thank you so much! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Zap_Brannigan Posted June 20, 2007 Share Posted June 20, 2007 Prof. comes to our class on a friday afternoon to find the class half empty Prof - "Whats goin on?Where is everyone" Me - "Its friday. Everyone has gone to the temple" *******Bada boom************ ------------------------------------------------------------ 8th std computer science hottie teacher - "How will you teach a 3rd std student addition" Me- "All i need is a ruler" *******Bada boom************ ------------------------------------------------------------ Thank you,thank you.......i will be here all week. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ram Posted June 21, 2007 Share Posted June 21, 2007 I really hate it When americans mis-pronounce my name. My optics professor was notorious for that. When he gave away the papers for the first mid-term , he mis-pronounced my name so badly that i contemplated writing my name as Andrew something for my 2nd midterm. Still, i proceeded to write my own name. On the day the professor gave out the 2nd midterm papers, he began by calling out the student names and handing out the paper to them. At one point , when he saw a paper, he looked at , raised his head , looked at the class , and then looked at the paper again as if to suggest - " I-have-no-clue-what-i-am-doing-here". I had a mild doubt then itself that it could be my paper. The professor , very hesistantly started saying something along the lines of " Sneelaam"... I could take no more and got up from my bench and annonced -- No No !! Its me !! You dont have to do it !!".. On hearing this , the whole class burst into laughter , including the professor himself. :haha: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bumper Posted June 21, 2007 Share Posted June 21, 2007 ROFTLMAO @ Dhondy & GIB. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gambit Posted June 21, 2007 Share Posted June 21, 2007 GIB and Dhondy :hysterical: :hysterical: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dhondy Posted June 21, 2007 Author Share Posted June 21, 2007 Here's another one from work. This one is not so much funny as it is instructive. Some of you might know that the FRCS (Fellowship of the Royal College of Surgeons), an exam that has to be passed by all British surgeons in higher training, is now also held in far-flung centres such as Singapore and Dubai. One of the skills that candidates are often examined in is "Breaking bad news", involving communicating diagnoses such as cancer to patients. In the UK, this involves sitting the patient down in a quiet room, often with a cup of tea, and discreetly bringing up the possibility that she may have cancer, before confirming it. A box of tissues will always be available in such a scenario in case the patient needs it, and there will usually be a nurse accompanying the doctor to lend support. Examinees are supposed to follow the same methods. One of my colleagues, a surgeon, was asked to be an examiner in Dubai a couple of years ago. During the examination, he asked a local Arab candidate to break the news to a woman that she had breast cancer. The candidate went up to the woman and shrugged his shoulders, "You have breast cancer...Inshallah." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lurker Posted June 21, 2007 Share Posted June 21, 2007 :haha: Good one Dhondy. And yes quite instructive too. I have a question for you. How different are Medical services in India and UK? I have a feeling that Indian Doctors(by that I mean those who practise in India) while as good as their British counterpart rely more on medicines than they do on things like Pschyiatry, Phyisotherapy etc etc. Is it just my impression that most Western Doctors are in good health while Indian Doctors appear fat and stressed? xx Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dhondy Posted June 21, 2007 Author Share Posted June 21, 2007 Actually, Lurks, I believe your question is shaped by your own experiences of US doctors and the US system. Quite clearly, you have noted the multidisciplinary nature of management, where physios, doctors, nurses, occupational therapists, podiatrists, and psychologists/psychiatrists often contribute to the patient's recovery, complementing each other. Yes, medicine in India is still very doctor driven. I believe this is because of the poor pay and lack of recognition for auxiliary health professionals. You probably knew that anyway. And again, an unfit doctor in India largely reflects the society around him. In the west, a large paunch in a doctor would be frowned upon, because this is a society that values fitness and good looks above almost anything else (Shame on me, I haven't run today!). Hence, the Dr Kildare types buzzing around the wards. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
FakeId Posted June 22, 2007 Share Posted June 22, 2007 not my story but it made me :giggle:: I have 2 dogs & I was buying a large bag of Pal at Big W and standing inline at the check out. A woman behind me asked if I had a dog. On impulse, I told her that no, I was starting The Pal Diet again although I probably shouldn't because I'd ended up in the hospital last time, but that I'd lost 50 pounds before I awakened in an intensive care ward with tubes coming out of most of my orifices and IV's in both arms. I told her that it was essentially a perfect diet and that the way that it works is to load your pants pockets with Pal nuggets and simply eat one or two every time you feel hungry & that the food is nutritionally complete so I was going to try it again. I have to mention here that practically everyone in the line was by now enthralled with my story, particularly a guy who was behind her. Horrified, she asked if I'd ended up in the hospital in that condition because I had been poisoned. I told her no; it was because I'd been sitting in the street licking my balls and a car hit me. I thought one guy was going to have a heart attack he was laughing so hard as he staggered out the door. Stupid b*tch...why else would I buy dog food?? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Zap_Brannigan Posted June 22, 2007 Share Posted June 22, 2007 OH my facking god.....you almost had me thr.... Extra kudos for being a female and using the ***** word.. Then i saw this "not my story but it made me" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
gator Posted June 22, 2007 Share Posted June 22, 2007 OH my facking god.....you almost had me thr.... Extra kudos for being a female and using the ***** word.. Then i saw this "not my story but it made me" were u reading from bottom-up??? j/k :hysterical: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Zap_Brannigan Posted June 22, 2007 Share Posted June 22, 2007 I just did a quick read.......found it hilarious....I replied to it....reread it again, that when i saw it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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