punjabiplaya Posted December 24, 2013 Author Posted December 24, 2013 My Pakistani neighbours gave me a fantastic Christmas present. They moved out :hysterical:
punjabiplaya Posted December 24, 2013 Author Posted December 24, 2013 I've got one of those faces that just attracts trouble Black
punjabiplaya Posted December 24, 2013 Author Posted December 24, 2013 Walt Disney's new film called "Jet Black," the non-racist version of "Snow White," has been put on hold. All of the 7 dwarfs: Dealer, Stealer, Mugger, Forger, Drive By, Pimp, and Wog have refused to sing "Hi Ho" because it offends black prostitutes. They also say they have no fecking intention of singing "It's off to work we go."
punjabiplaya Posted December 24, 2013 Author Posted December 24, 2013 I asked my boss 'what to do with this 6metre roll of bubble wrap?' He replied 'just pop it in the corner'. 4 fecking hours it took me!
punjabiplaya Posted January 16, 2014 Author Posted January 16, 2014 I was looking at my wife: no teeth in, tits on her belly, hair a mess and smoking a roll up. Then she cocked her leg and let out a massive fart. "You are a mess and I'm disgusted with you," I said. "I'm still the woman you love and married," she said. "Sometimes we all let ourselves go a bit." "We're on our fecking honeymoon," I replied.
punjabiplaya Posted January 16, 2014 Author Posted January 16, 2014 My mate paddy just told me that he robbed a shop last night. What you get? I asked. 26 pictures, he replied smiling while showing me. The cheapest one is worth over £180,000. I said, paddy, these are from an estate agents :hysterical::hysterical::hysterical::hysterical:
punjabiplaya Posted January 16, 2014 Author Posted January 16, 2014 woman sets her fanny on fire one evening by accident.. . . . husband says quick stand on the balcony and let the wind blow it out. . . . she slips and falls . . . PADDY and MURPHY were stood below looking up at the night sky . . . . And see a flaming fanny hurtling towards them . . . PADDY says 2 MURPHY is that HALEYS COMET?. . . . . . MURPHY says dont be so fecking stupid . . . its a TWATTALITE !!!
FischerTal Posted January 16, 2014 Posted January 16, 2014 My Pakistani neighbours gave me a fantastic Christmas present. They moved out :hysterical: :cantstop:
SLICKR392 Posted January 20, 2014 Posted January 20, 2014 My Pakistani neighbours gave me a fantastic Christmas present. They moved out :hysterical: :hysterical::hysterical::hysterical:
punjabiplaya Posted January 21, 2014 Author Posted January 21, 2014 I went for a testicle check up last wk. The little Thai nurse cupped my balls & said,"Don't worry, it's quite normal to get an erection during this procedure" I said "I haven't got an erection" She said "No, but I have" :--D
punjabiplaya Posted January 21, 2014 Author Posted January 21, 2014 I watched the 50th anniversary of doctor who the other night. i can't believe how far fetched it was. 13 doctors and not one of them a paki..
punjabiplaya Posted January 21, 2014 Author Posted January 21, 2014 David Moyes has promised fans of Manchester United that they will be in a major European competition next year...even if he has to write the song himself :cantstop:
punjabiplaya Posted January 21, 2014 Author Posted January 21, 2014 Nicolas Anelka says he made his 'quenelle' as a gesture of support to the top French comedian Dieudonne M'bala. So I told him to feck off back to his own country as a gesture of support to the top British comedian Bernard Manning.
punjabiplaya Posted January 28, 2014 Author Posted January 28, 2014 I've just started a sexual relationship with a blind woman, its very rewarding but quite challenging, it took me bloody ages to get her husbands voice right... :hysterical:
punjabiplaya Posted January 28, 2014 Author Posted January 28, 2014 Michael Jackson once sang, 'It don't matter if you're black or white.' So true. Unless of course, you're black :--D
punjabiplaya Posted January 28, 2014 Author Posted January 28, 2014 What's black and sexually aroused right now? All of Justin Beiber's potential future cellmates. :haha:
punjabiplaya Posted January 28, 2014 Author Posted January 28, 2014 Wayne Rooney has been told he will not be allowed to leave to one of United's main rivals, which currently rules out Norwich and Southampton
punjabiplaya Posted January 28, 2014 Author Posted January 28, 2014 David Moyes has promised fans of Manchester United that they will be in a major European competition next year...even if he has to write the song himself . :cantstop::cantstop:
Laaloo Posted January 28, 2014 Posted January 28, 2014 David Moyes has promised fans of Manchester United that they will be in a major European competition next year...even if he has to write the song himself . :cantstop::cantstop: :hysterical::hysterical::hysterical::hysterical:
SLICKR392 Posted January 30, 2014 Posted January 30, 2014 I've got one of those faces that just attracts trouble Black Ouch ! :phehehe:
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