punjabiplaya Posted March 27, 2012 Author Posted March 27, 2012 A guy is watching TV and suddenly Yells, "Dont enter that church you fool!" His wife calls out from the kitchen, "What are you watching?" "OUR WEDDING!" He replies :hysterical:
Laaloo Posted March 27, 2012 Posted March 27, 2012 A guy is watching TV and suddenly Yells, "Dont enter that church you fool!" His wife calls out from the kitchen, "What are you watching?" "OUR WEDDING!" He replies :hysterical: :hysterical::hysterical::hysterical::hysterical:
Sid Posted March 27, 2012 Posted March 27, 2012 A guy is watching TV and suddenly Yells, "Dont enter that church you fool!" His wife calls out from the kitchen, "What are you watching?" "OUR WEDDING!" He replies :hysterical:
dial_100 Posted March 29, 2012 Posted March 29, 2012 Nigerian scammer Good Day, I have a business proposal of USD $22,500,000.00 only for you to transactwith me from my bank to your country. All confirmable documents to back upthe claims will be made available to you prior to your acceptance.Reply to address:XXXX_XXXX15@yahoo.co.jp and I will let you know what is required ofyou. Best Regards, Mr. Vincent ##### Reply by a teen age kid messing up with Nigerian scammer Mr. Vincent, I do not want to deal with you any more. You and you bank are total cheat. Last time you sent me an email asking me to claim $5,896,000.00 from the bank. I went to the bank in OHIO with all my documents. They cheated me and only gave $5,890,000.00. They refused to give me my $6000. I think either you or your bank is cheating on me and I am not getting my full money. I will stop all the deals with you until you get me my $6,000. Thanks, Sandy xxxxx In another email, he wrote to another scammer that you buggers sent $44 mil in $20 bills. My old mom died counting that money. I wont deal with you any more..something like that. :hysterical::hysterical:
punjabiplaya Posted April 3, 2012 Author Posted April 3, 2012 I woke up this morning to overhear my wife talking about me in the next room. "He is so fecking inconsiderate" she moaned, "He knows I'm allergic to cats and he still buys a fecking cat. I've had enough, if he crosses the line one more time I'm leaving him." I couldn't believe my ears, it really was a wake up call. With tears in my eyes I phoned the cat adoption service right away. 'Hello? Yes, I'll take all of them please'
punjabiplaya Posted April 3, 2012 Author Posted April 3, 2012 What do you call a lesbian dinosaur? Lickalotopus
punjabiplaya Posted April 3, 2012 Author Posted April 3, 2012 After pakis have sex they like to take photos of that person and stick it on there wall. It's a good talking point when people come round, "ah, that's nice," they say, "you've got a lot of photo's of your family up there."
beetle Posted April 4, 2012 Posted April 4, 2012 A guy is watching TV and suddenly Yells, "Dont enter that church you fool!" His wife calls out from the kitchen, "What are you watching?" "OUR WEDDING!" He replies :hysterical: :hysterical::hysterical::hysterical::hysterical:
punjabiplaya Posted April 4, 2012 Author Posted April 4, 2012 The doctor said to my wife, "Push Mrs Young, push. I can see the head now." They really need to make those MRI scan machines bigger for fat people to fit into :cantstop:
punjabiplaya Posted April 4, 2012 Author Posted April 4, 2012 Paddy wanted to sell his car so his mate told him to wind the mileage back and he would get a better price when he saw him a few days later he asked how he got on and paddy said when he finished winding it back it only had 7000 on the clock so he decided to keep it... :hysterical::hysterical:
punjabiplaya Posted April 4, 2012 Author Posted April 4, 2012 Went to the Barbers and asked for a Liverpool FC haircut. Mess at the back, nothing on the sides and nothing up front. He charged me £130 million. pains me to post this as a big lfc supporter lol
punjabiplaya Posted April 4, 2012 Author Posted April 4, 2012 Amir reported a dead woman lying in a field to the police. They asked him: 'How did you find her body?' he said, 'Her ti*s were ok, but the rigormortis had tightened her ar*e a bit too much for my liking'.
punjabiplaya Posted April 4, 2012 Author Posted April 4, 2012 What's worse than a Black or a Paki? A paki who thinks he's black. :haha:
punjabiplaya Posted April 4, 2012 Author Posted April 4, 2012 Pakistani Pornography is so unrealistic. What woman or goat actually gives consent?
punjabiplaya Posted April 7, 2012 Author Posted April 7, 2012 Pakistan's military has confirmed that more than 100 of its soldiers are missing following an avalanche. Rescue efforts have been hampered by sniffer dogs refusing to work the case. :hysterical::hysterical:
punjabiplaya Posted April 7, 2012 Author Posted April 7, 2012 I had to go in to my son's school, as they were concerned about him, his teacher said, "Thomas is under the impression that our school trip away next week is to where bombs are made in England." I said, "But it is isn't it?" She said, "No, you do know where we are going, right?" I said, "Yes, Bradford."
punjabiplaya Posted April 8, 2012 Author Posted April 8, 2012 When the wife died, it was months before friends and family finally rallied round. They saw I was a mess... no sleep, weight loss, bloodshot eyes, unlaundered clothes... They wrote me a note: "Steve, you've got to stop partying!"
punjabiplaya Posted April 8, 2012 Author Posted April 8, 2012 "Premature ejaculator,Seeks beautiful blonde female with massive ti*s, long tanned legs & a waxed........ wait.... .........oh, feck it, it doesn't matter now!" :hysterical::hysterical::hysterical:
gaurav92 Posted April 8, 2012 Posted April 8, 2012 "Premature ejaculator,Seeks beautiful blonde female with massive ti*s, long tanned legs & a waxed........ wait.... .........oh, feck it, it doesn't matter now!" :hysterical::hysterical::hysterical: :haha:
punjabiplaya Posted April 10, 2012 Author Posted April 10, 2012 A sardar stood in the dock accused of throwing a man from the 10th floor of a block of flats. The judge asked, "Have you anything to say in your defence before sentencing?" The sardar says, "He was only a Paki." "That's not the fecking point," said the judge, "He could have hit somebody." :hysterical::hysterical::hysterical:
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