If there was a general election tommorow, who would you vote for?

[Sachin=GOD]

Dude, who’s gonna fly the plane?

It’s 2013. Imagine we are all passengers in a plane flying at 30,000 feet above sea level. Now let’s make it large and say we are in an Airbus A380, an aircraft built for long haul flights. Some of us are under the impression we’re headed for Utopia. Yet others dream of Shangri La or El Dorado. And some of us are merely content to escape without bodily injuries when the plane lands at some unknown yet to be determined destination. All goes swimmingly well for some time. And then, it becomes disconcertingly obvious that we haven’t heard from the pilot for a while. So, I decide to go check things out. As I walk along the aisle towards the pilot’s cabin, the whispers get louder. Turns out that we are running out of gas and we have just a few hours left. But the good news is that we can refuel in mid-air if we manage to not crash the plane first. So it has become obvious that unless we find a good pilot, we’re all screwed. Naturally I appoint myself chief problem solver and decide to interview candidates for the job. Now, read the interviews carefully because I’m going to ask you to vote for a pilot at the end. Interview 1 What Ho!: State your name, please. Manmohan Singh: WH: OK. I get it. Your silence speaks a thousand words. But if you don’t want to get fired, I must ask you to speak. Aren’t you our current pilot? What the hell happened? Why are we in trouble? MS: Winds of global turbulence. My wings got clipped. My crew didn’t cooperate. You have no idea how hard this is. WH: Hmm.. From your resume, I see that you’re not even a trained pilot. You have a PhD in air traffic control. Who on earth went and made you our pilot? MS: WH: Sir, what happened to the fuel? Why are we running short? MS: I swear to God I don’t know how that happened. They told me to make a few unscheduled stops in Switzerland. Next thing I knew, the fuel gauge showed ‘E’. WH: What’s the most important thing you’ll do if we let you keep your job? MS: I believe in inclusion. I won’t throw anyone off the plane. Even if it means crashing the plane first. Either we fly together or we die together. I say we die together. And please don’t let me keep my job.. I beg of you.. please.. WH: OK, you want us to die together. And you don’t want to pilot the plane. Got it. Thank you Sir. Interview 2 WH: And you are..? < random voices from the back.. “Dey, how dare you ask his name? Do you not know that he’s the Lion of Gujarat?” > WH: Ok..ok.. Sorry. Modi-ji, I’m having a hard time hearing you over the cacophony of your supporters. Can you ask them to pipe down? NaMo: WH: Sir, have you flown a plane before? NaMo: Yes. I have. Not an A380. A smaller one. I’ve logged 11 years of flying experience. It’s all on my website. All my fans know this by heart. WH: That’s good. I’ve heard that you had some trouble with passengers from a certain community on your flights. How do you respond to that? NaMo: When you fly a plane, a few birds tend to get caught in the engines. C’est la vie. WH: No regrets at all? Come on sir. Don’t be a Darth Vader. NaMo: What’s that got to do with flying a plane? Look, I’m the best you’ve got. Everyone knows it. WH: Come on sir. You’re not making this easy for us. Tell us the truth. NaMo: You want the truth? YOU CAN’T HANDLE THE TRUTH. You’re screwed without someone like me. Namaste-ji. Nice talking to you. < smiles and leaves> Interview 3 WH: Hey Rahul, how’s things in London these days? RG: Don’t even ask, dude. I can’t even go peacefully anywhere without a flood ravaging a state somewhere in the country. WH: We all love you. You’re our Prince. We want you to share our joys and sorrows with us. Please understand. RG: Hey what’s that shiny object over there? WH: Okie. Now, coming back to our interview.. You’re clearly not a pilot. Why are you even interviewing? Why bother? What’s wrong with London? Or Rome? RG: Hello? I’ll have you know that my dad was a pilot. And his mother before him. And my great grandpa is the great grand daddy of all pilots. And my great great grand pa was a lawyer… WH: Ok ok, i get it. Stop. Umm, let’s see.. what’s the most important thing a pilot has to do? RG: That shiny object over there is distracting me. WH: I think we’re done here, young Rahul. Stay blessed. Interview 4 WH: And who may you be? NK: I am the SECULAR man. WH: Nitish-ji, at the risk of asking the obvious, what the hell does that mean? And what does that have to do with flying a plane? NK: Hey, I’ve flown a plane too. Unlike the Lion of Gujarat, I don’t hit birds. WH: Do you wish to fly this plane, Nitish-ji? < voice from the back: Saar.. he’s 100 percent tunch pilot maal material.. > < WH: Is that Diggy or Shotgun? Either way, khamosh! > WH: So, do you want to fly this plane or not? NK: I don’t want THAT guy to fly THIS plane. WH: Ok, I hear you. See ya later. Interview 5 WH: Hi Arvind, how’s the rabble rousing going? AK: Things are pretty good. I have 1 lakh followers on Twitter. And I’ve disconnected 24 electricity meters till date. WH: Have you flown a plane before? AK: Plane-aaa? I haven’t even driven an auto yaar.. WH: Ciao. See you later. AK: Hey this is unfair! If you don’t give me a chance, I’ll remove the batteries from this plane. WH: My advice. Help us pick a pilot instead of trying to become one yourself. Interview 6 WH: Hazare-ji, do you really want to do this? AH: Not really. I prefer to spend my time tying drunken fellows to trees and whipping them. WH: What are you then interviewing for? AH: All I want is a Jan Lokpal watching the pilot and crew. I don’t trust these guys. WH: Nice meeting you, sir. Interview 7 WH: Hello Arnab. What are you even doing here? AG: Straight question for What Ho. Who’s going to pilot this plane? WH: I take it that it’s not you. AG: Dei.. don’t avoid. The nation needs answers. WH: Dei. I thought the nation had already written to you saying it doesn’t need answers? AG: Be careful. Be very careful. One does not simply use ‘Dei’ with Arnab Goswami. WH: Ciao, Arnab. I’ve got work to do. Interview 9 WH: Welcome Subramaniam Swamy Sir! You are a veritable international man of mystery. A fountain of conspiracy theories. A source of inspiration for anyone who thinks Twitter is a source of inspiration…Sir,it’s an honor having.. SS: What Ho, let me cut to the chase. I have filed a PIL with the Supreme Court asking for it to urgently appoint a new pilot. Hearing is next Tuesday. WH: Next Tuesday? We’re going to crash in 2 hours.. Anyway, please go on. Will we get any results? SS: Results and all may or may not come. Keep filing PILs and tweeting. That’s my game. WH: What’s your typical day like? SS: Some days, I file more PILs and send less tweets. On other days, I send more tweets and file less PILs. WH: What do you tweet about? SS: I tweet about how TDK controls MMS’s joystick. About how CRTs are really Buddhu chelas. WH: What the hell does that even mean? SS: Well, you appear to be more idiotic than those Buddhu chelas. Let me put it this way. By TDK, I am not referring to a Japanese corporation. WH: Have you flown a plane before? SS: I was a mechanic 20 years back. And I got a degree from Harvard 40 years back. WH: Sir, do you want to be the pilot or not? SS: Crazier things have happened. Why not? Let me tell you one thing. If I become the pilot, I’m taking you all to Disneyland. WH: Thank you sir. Final Interview WH: Ma’am, why are you crying? SG: I’m moved by hearing that people from a certain community on this plane are going to die if this plane crashes. WH: Ma’am, if this plane crashes, people from all communities will die. BTW, rumor has it that you have a lot to do with this mess… that you haven’t allowed Manmohan to use his joystick? SG: Nothing of the sort. It’s typical Indian mentality to blame foreigners for their mess. WH: Ma’am, why don’t you just take over and fly the plane? I have a feeling you’ll be good at this. Democracy be damned, I’ll give you the job if you ask for it. SG: Sorry. Thanks but no thanks. I can’t be the pilot and manage bank accounts at the same time, no? WH: I’m sure it’s our loss. Thank you, ma’am. Sorry folks, if this has been exhausting. I will now lean back, pour myself a stiff one and hand over the unenviable job of voting for a pilot to you.

http://whatho.in/2013/dude-whos-gonna-fly-the-plane/ :hatsoff:

[1983-2011]

I will give my vote to BJP...

How did APCO find this forum:cantstop:

[Sachin=GOD]

In Pictures: How Rajya Sabha seats are auctioned and sold to the highest bidder Recently, senior Congress leader Chaudhary Birender Singh raised a storm by claiming that people are ready to shell out Rs.100 crore to get a Rajya Sabha seat. What is the reality? Our political correspondent, Rajnithi Sarkarwala, went behind the scenes to capture in pictures the actual bidding process to bag seats in India’s apex legislative body that lies at the heart of India’s political economy: :hysterical::hysterical::hysterical::hysterical:

[adi B]

:hysterical::hysterical::hysterical::hysterical:

[Clarke]

:hysterical: :hysterical:

[King Tendulkar]

wtf:hysterical:

[Crookbond]

[someone]

Someone's interesting take: Reasons why Congress is winning for the past 65 years and why it will win in the future: ( A View Point) Currently, on an average (over states) there are 15% Muslims, 8% Christians, 7% Others and 70% Hindus. That is out of 100 people, there are 70 Hindus, 8 Christians, 15 Muslims and 7 Others. Voter registration is as follows: 90% of Muslims, 90% Christians and 60% Hindus and 90% Others. This means, that is out of 100 people, 42 Hindus, 14 Muslims, 7 Christians and 6 'Others' will Register for vote. Now, interesting point Out of the registered voters having voter ID or at least having interest in selecting their representative.... Have a look at the number of turnouts 50% Hindus will vote, 90% Muslims will vote, 90% Christians will vote and 90% others will vote That is ultimately 21 Hindus will vote, 13 Muslims will vote, 6 Christians and 5 'Others' will vote during election and these people are responsible for selecting the representative and deciding the future of our Great India.... That is these, 45 people of total population. It is highly likely that out of 13 Muslims, 10 will vote for Congress, Out of 6 Christians, 5 will vote for Congress and out of 5 others, 3 will vote for congress. That is Congress will get 18 non Hindus votes, BJP may get 1 Muslim or Christian and 1 others vote. That is BJP may get 2 non Hindu votes. Other parties, that are third front, may get 2 Muslim or Christian and 1 vote from others. That is, 'Others' may get 3 non Hindu votes. Coming to Hindu votes now Out of 21 Hindus. If 5 vote for Congress, 10 vote for BJP and 6 vote for other parties Final result will be Congress 23 votes, BJP 12 votes, other parties will get 9 votes. This has been the trend since 1990, therefore, Congress do not bother for Hindu vote. Congress loses in States where the Muslims do not vote for them. If Congress scares minority from majority, which is easy in the name of secularism, their 90% work is done....and they have been doing so.. religiously.. It is highly likely that the trend will continue and may vary by few percent and the Congress will remain in Power, as minority population increases, for the next 100 years..

An interesting comment found on FB. Congress will definitely prosper with this rule and divide policy

[Sachin=GOD]

An interesting comment found on FB. Congress will definitely prosper with this rule and divide policy

quite an accurate analysis. And thats the reason why Cong has the likes of Diggy, Shakeel Ahmad etc giving pathetic statements every now and then - they are simply there to keep the Congress' biggest vote bank happy.

[someone]

quite an accurate analysis. And thats the reason why Cong has the likes of Diggy' date=' Shakeel Ahmad etc giving pathetic statements every now and then - they are simply there to keep the Congress' biggest vote bank happy.[/quote'] Yes. And it's not even vote bank politics but pure evil thinking by Congress. We have failed to reach our true potential under their leadership and actually the gap between communities has only increased with their hatred propaganda. And, one thing I do disagree on that post is that the Muslims % is definitely being understated. There are greater ratio than stated. Some incorrect statistics purposefully being presented.

[asterix]

Yes. And it's not even vote bank politics but pure evil thinking by Congress. We have failed to reach our true potential under their leadership and actually the gap between communities has only increased with their hatred propaganda. And, one thing I do disagree on that post is that the Muslims % is definitely being understated. There are greater ratio than stated. Some incorrect statistics purposefully being presented.

What's preventing BJP to take all the communities with it, just like it has done in Gujarat elections? You can blame Congress as much as possible but BJP/RSS too are helping it in alienating other communities.. No point in blaming Congress and Public...

[The Outsider]

An interesting comment found on FB. Congress will definitely prosper with this rule and divide policy

What's the source of those numbers?

[adi B]

An interesting comment found on FB. Congress will definitely prosper with this rule and divide policy

i dont think the numbers are correct,90 % muslims turnout for voting!! not possible i think but the general idea in this stat is in propinquity with the general trend since 90`s

[BeautifulGame]

The simple reason why Congress keeps winning is BJP doesnt have the strong party structure in most of the states to garnerent anti-Congress sentiments.They arent even opposition party half of Indian states. Add to that their Hindutva agenda which alienates considerable minorities and State parties (which often gain anti-congress) votes it isnt hard to figure out why Congress keeps winning.

[CSK Fan]

An interesting comment found on FB. Congress will definitely prosper with this rule and divide policy

You wouldn't believe the kind of cr@p posted on facebook

[adi B]

The simple reason why Congress keeps winning is BJP doesnt have the strong party structure in most of the states to garnerent anti-Congress sentiments.They arent even opposition party half of Indian states. Add to that their Hindutva agenda which alienates considerable minorities and State parties (which often gain anti-congress) votes it isnt hard to figure out why Congress keeps winning.

yes,pretty much

[The Outsider]

i dont think the numbers are correct' date='90 % muslims turnout for voting!! not possible i think but the general idea in this stat is in propinquity with the general trend since 90`s[/quote'] http://blogs.thehindu.com/elections2009/?p=1794 Based on actual data rather than some junkie high on crack on Facebook.

[adi B]

http://blogs.thehindu.com/elections2009/?p=1794 Based on actual data rather than some junkie high on crack on Facebook.

yup,here`s the data from the link

The impression that the community turns out in large numbers to vote stems from the fact that constituencies with a high concentration of Muslims (above 30 per cent) tend to have a higher turnout. But this is largely due to communal polarisation, a phenomenon that leads both Muslims and Hindus to vote in larger numbers. In any case, the number of such constituencies is very small. Muslims constitute 13.4 per cent of the country’s population, and perhaps make up a smaller percentage of the electoral roll. Most Muslims live in constituencies where they do not account for even 10 per cent of the electorate.

The evidence gathered by the National Election Studies (NES) carried out by CSDS shows that the Muslim turnout is not very different from the rest of the electors. In the last four general elections, the turnout among Muslims was 59 per cent while the all-India figure was 60 per cent. In fact, the figures in 2004 suggest the turnout among Muslims was much lower than average.

[Sachin=GOD]

The Takeover That Wasn’t Why Raj could not snatch the Shiv Sena away from Uddhav after Bal Thackeray’s death

MUMBAI ~ When Shiv Sena chief Bal Thackeray died last year, many Mumbaikars expected that his nephew Raj Thackeray, chief of the Maharashtra Navnirman Sena (MNS), would take over the party he had split apart from. Considered a mirror image of his uncle in temperament, manner and even looks (with allowances for the age difference), Raj was widely seen as a natural inheritor of the Sena founder’s political legacy. All he had to do, some felt, was snap his fingers for Sainiks to take to the streets in his support and force the Thackeray pretender Uddhav, Bal’s son, to make way for the real defender of the Marathi manoos. Now, nine months after the Sena founder’s death, Raj has remained just that, a mirror image, while Uddhav has taken firm control of the party. Raj has unexpectedly been floundering in politics, picking up an odd issue here or there, but largely staying quiet—possibly disappointed that the clamour he had expected among Sainiks for his leadership did not begin. For all his aggression, the Sainiks seem to have settled for Uddhav’s far-less-public style of politics. Though there had been past indications that Raj would make a bid to take over the Shiv Sena, few are willing to bet on such an event now. It is no secret that senior Sena leaders who have been unhappy with Uddhav’s approach feel let down by this. Raj’s own attitude towards his cousin, which has been under close watch, suggests little hostility. Meanwhile Uddhav, who has developed a ‘political cunningness’ in recent months, as many say, has used the time to his advantage. He has been moving across Maharashtra, interacting with partymen in an effort to consolidate his position as their leader. While Raj remains ensconced within the confines of his Shivaji Park residence, Uddhav’s outreach effort has sent Sainiks a signal that he intends leading the party with all he’s got. It has also kept an exodus from the Sena to the MNS from materialising. Indeed, switchovers have been so few that Uddhav’s detractors are perplexed. Those close to both cousins say that this in itself amounts to an endorsement of Uddhav’s leadership by Sainiks at large. +++ The chasm between the cousins, however, is thought to have widened. In the past few months, both have kept away from each other, mimimising interaction. Uddhav may lack the showmanship of Raj on public platforms, but his behind-the-scenes moves appear to have worked. The months since Bal Thackeray’s death have seen Uddhav move away from the shadow of his father and emerge his own man. Comparisons are no longer drawn with his late father or even with his cousin. This, his admirers say, has been achieved with subtlety. There is also talk that Gujarat Chief Minister Narendra Modi, who is set to lead the Sena ally BJP to the Lok Sabha polls, has renewed efforts to bring Uddhav and Raj together again. As the rationale goes, the BJP would want a united Sena as its ally. But this has been denied by Gopinath Munde, the senior leader in charge of the BJP campaign in Maharashtra. The mood within the state BJP is upbeat, and a patch up between the Thackeray cousins could complicate already vexed relations with the Sena, an ally of over two decades, over local issues of seat sharing. Ego and ambition seem to be the big stumbling blocks between the cousins that make it hard for them to join forces. Unlike the late Sena chief who believed in remote-controlling his men, Uddhav and Raj are both keen on wielding direct power. Both see themselves as Maharashtra CM and neither is willing to play second fiddle to the other. Even their ideas and agendas appear to differ. All of this means that a merger of the Shiv Sena and MNS, or even an electoral alliance, is almost impossible. While the Thackeray cousins have differences, in electoral terms their appeals overlap. In fact, after Bal Thackeray’s demise, many expected Raj to run away with the Sena’s vote bank. However, despite his early playing to the Marathi manoos gallery after he broke away to form the MNS, Raj has been reluctant to make further efforts. Apart from meeting partymen, Uddhav has also been on a mission to endear himself to Mumbaikars on civic issues. His recent public apology to the city for potholed roads has earned him brownie points. The Shiv Sena has run the Brihanmumbai Municipal Corporation for two decades. The Sena’s clout in Mumbai, while still significant on account of Maharashtrian support, has been loosening in recent years as the city’s population has grown more diverse. In the context of this trend, a split of the manoos voter base between the Sena and MNS has meant a weakening of both parties. Before his death, Thackeray had called Uddhav and Raj and asked them to come together and form a single political entity in the interests of sons-of-the-soil. On cue, Chandumama Vaidya, the maternal uncle of Uddhav and Raj Thackeray, had pledged to fulfill that dream of his late brother-in-law. As the brother of Meenatai and Kantatai, the mothers of the cousins, Vaidya was seen as the right man for the task. However, he seems to have given up his efforts. Ambitious wives on both sides are said to be working to ensure that the cousins do not patch up. Uddhav’s wife Rashmi and Raj’s wife Sharmila, it is said, will never allow a merger as they see larger independent roles for themselves in the state’s power structure. +++ Sources say that Uddhav is keen on rebranding the Sena with a strong infusion of young blood. The old guard so central to his father’s planning will find no role in Uddhav’s Shiv Sena. The political careers of Manohar Joshi, Subhash Desai and a host of senior leaders are over now, as Uddhav puts his own team in place. His son Aditya has a role as well and is playing a kind of party mascot to attract the youth. The MNS chief, in contrast, lacks his cousin’s organisational skills. Even seven years after the MNS was set up, the party’s physical presence in the state remains sparse. He has only concentrated on its growth in Mumbai and Nasik. Though Raj’s blueprint for his party included a network of shakhas along the lines of the Shiv Sena’s, no move has been made in that direction. This has stunted the party’s expansion plan and has in some places even seen Sainik switchovers return to their original Sena. Raj has done little about it. Given current trends, the MNS leader’s habit of taking extended breaks from interactions with his activists may prove to be his undoing. As polls approach, if both the Shiv Sena and MNS continue to vie for the same political space and constituents, then clashes between the two parties may be imminent. In the past, Sainik violence has been along ideological fractures. From the mid 60s to the late 80s, for example, the Shiv Sena engaged the state’s Communists in street battles, with South Indians occasional targets of the party’s wrath. As the BJP’s Rama Janmabhoomi campaign gained pace, Bal Thackeray’s focus shifted to Mumbai’s Muslims, a phase that saw bloody riots in the city in late 1992 and early 1993. With that legacy of strongarm politics, the Shiv Sena—named after the 17th century ruler Shivaji—has a reputation that unsettles not just minorities but also secularists of all kind. Uddhav’s agenda, however, has signalled something of a retreat from that toxic mix of identity and agitational politics of the past, with intimidatory tactics replaced with a relatively moderate outlook. Under Uddhav, the Sena has not spouted much Marathi manoos rhetoric, though the response of Sainiks to a harmless tweet by Shobhaa De recently suggests that their old attitudes are as hard as ever. “Maharashtra is a raging fire, don’t play with it,†Uddhav had told the media, reacting to De’s ‘why not?’ on statehood for Mumbai, and Sainiks turned up at De’s doorstep to protest. Sainik-turned-Congressman Narayan Rane’s son Nitesh had some nasty words for De, too, but the angriest response was from Raj Thackeray, who told De that separating Mumbai from Maharashtra was not as easy as getting a divorce. Since Sainiks had already beaten the MNS to De’s door, Raj’s brigade refrained from street protests. Yet, the MNS is the likelier of the two parties to resort to threats and ultimatums in the manner of the Sena of old. This would be apiece with Raj’s attempt to hijack the Shiv Sena’s identity politics, the kind that wants North Indian migrants denied jobs in Mumbai, Marathi films given an edge over Hindi films, Marathi made compulsory as the language in use by the government, civic offices and courts, not to mention school curricula. For all of Raj’s attempts to hijack his uncle’s party, however, it is now clear that it will always remain a coup bid, not a takeover. And the mirror image will stay just that—an image.

http://www.openthemagazine.com/article/nation/the-takeover-that-wasn-t

[Haarkarjeetgaye]

definitely not for congress. i want renuka out