punjabiplaya Posted February 19, 2011 Author Posted February 19, 2011 After having a 69 with his bird.. Bob remembered he had a Dentist appointment Afraid they would smell fanny on his breath,he brushed his teeth,used dental floss,a bottle of Listerine & ate a packet of strong mints .Feeling confident in the Dentist's chair,he opened his mouth. The dentist got close & said "Did u have a 69 b4 u got here?". "How did u know" said Bob, "Does my breath smell of fanny?" "No" he replied "U have a skidmark on your forehead"
punjabiplaya Posted February 19, 2011 Author Posted February 19, 2011 I saw six men kicking and punching the mother-in-law. My neighbour said 'Are you going to help?' I said 'No, Six should be enough." :cantstop:
punjabiplaya Posted February 19, 2011 Author Posted February 19, 2011 Murphy & Mary decide to try a 69. Murphy's never tried it so Mary says she'll show him. She tells him to lie on the floor and squats over him. As she lowers herself onto his face she farts. Apologising, she tries again but farts again. Murphy jumps up and storms out yelling, "You can feck right off if you think I'm hanging around for another 67 of them!"
punjabiplaya Posted February 19, 2011 Author Posted February 19, 2011 I walked in on my nan sucking my grandads co*k. I thought thats fecking disgusting, it really should have been cremated with the rest of him
punjabiplaya Posted February 20, 2011 Author Posted February 20, 2011 Me and the wife were arguing at the bus stop when the bus pulled up. The driver opened the doors and asked if we were getting on. I said, "No, she's a bit*h".
punjabiplaya Posted February 20, 2011 Author Posted February 20, 2011 I was in the pub with the missus last night, and I said, "I love you." She said, " Is that you or the beer talking?" I replied, "It's me, talking to the beer."
Sachinism Posted February 21, 2011 Posted February 21, 2011 Several Muslim nations have now seen widespread unrest. First Tunisia, then Egypt, now Libya and Bahrain. Will Britain be next ?
Jadoo Posted February 21, 2011 Posted February 21, 2011 I got thrown out of McDonalds this morning. The girl serving me was an absolute stunner and she told me she could make it large for 30p. I replied that she already had, but could she finish me off for a pound. :haha: A man walks into Tesco' date=' picks up Ribena & a bag of sugar. He pays for the Ribena, but walks out with the sugar. Once in court, the judge asks him 'Why did you steal the sugar?' To which the man replied 'Bumbaclart!! look pon de back of the Ribena, it seh Sugar Free maan!![/quote'] I saw six men kicking and punching the mother-in-law. My neighbour said 'Are you going to help?' I said 'No, Six should be enough." :cantstop: Several Muslim nations have now seen widespread unrest. First Tunisia, then Egypt, now Libya and Bahrain. Will Britain be next ? :hysterical::hysterical::hysterical::hysterical::hysterical::hysterical:
Sid Posted February 21, 2011 Posted February 21, 2011 I saw six men kicking and punching the mother-in-law. My neighbour said 'Are you going to help?' I said 'No, Six should be enough." :cantstop: :hysterical::hysterical::hysterical::hysterical::hysterical::hysterical::hysterical::cantstop:
punjabiplaya Posted February 21, 2011 Author Posted February 21, 2011 An Air Pakistan jumbo jet carrying 474 pakis disapeared off the radar 36 seconds ago......The search has now been called off
punjabiplaya Posted February 21, 2011 Author Posted February 21, 2011 My son was thrown out of school today for letting a girl in his class give him a wa*k.I said, "Son! That's three schools this year. You should stop this immediatley or they will ban you from teaching altogether".
punjabiplaya Posted February 21, 2011 Author Posted February 21, 2011 An African guy just came up to me and tried to get me to donate to charity and when i said no he started crying. Emotional black male.
punjabiplaya Posted February 21, 2011 Author Posted February 21, 2011 I must have really pissed off my missis when I tried erotic asphyxiation on her while we were having sex. She's been lying there for five days now, giving me the silent treatment.
punjabiplaya Posted February 21, 2011 Author Posted February 21, 2011 Question"Are there too many immigrants in Britain?" 12% said ”Yes” 88% said عهد الأمن العالمي بواش
punjabiplaya Posted February 21, 2011 Author Posted February 21, 2011 An unemployed irishman storms into the jobcentre, " i have been dialling 0800 1730 for two days solid and you basta*ds have not answered the phone once. The woman looks up at him and says; "Paddy you thick basta*d those are our opening times"
Laaloo Posted February 21, 2011 Posted February 21, 2011 An Air Pakistan jumbo jet carrying 474 pakis disapeared off the radar 36 seconds ago......The search has now been called off :hysterical::hysterical::hysterical::hysterical::hysterical::hysterical::hysterical::hysterical::hysterical::hysterical:
Sid Posted February 22, 2011 Posted February 22, 2011 Question"Are there too many immigrants in Britain?" 12% said â€Yes†88% said عهد الأمن العالمي بواش :cantstop:
DomainK Posted February 23, 2011 Posted February 23, 2011 For ****'s sake, what a mess to sort out. I can't believe I've mixed their Valentine's Day cards up. The girlfriend now thinks I love her and the wife thinks I want to **** her.
beetle Posted February 23, 2011 Posted February 23, 2011 For ****'s sake, what a mess to sort out. I can't believe I've mixed their Valentine's Day cards up. The girlfriend now thinks I love her and the wife thinks I want to **** her. :hysterical::hysterical::hysterical:
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