Laaloo Posted August 17, 2013 Share Posted August 17, 2013 Nowadays men have left their manhood behind. I know bunch that are afraid of their (house) wives. I dont understand why but its just some sick shyt. One boss at work and one at home. Best advise for new generation. Date the bich first, see how she gets along with your family and if she gets accepted in pride. If you cant date then a year long engagement. Nice mentality. Pehli se hi kutti bandai :nice: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
KeyboardWarrior Posted August 17, 2013 Share Posted August 17, 2013 Lol... after Shadi ..... EeFBJMYskZw :hysterical::hysterical::hysterical: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
beetle Posted August 18, 2013 Share Posted August 18, 2013 (edited) Quote That is a very poor view.There may be the Wife's brother who will look after her parents,if not then the husband has the responsibility to look after them.But who will look after the Huband's family? Did my wife's parents give birth to me?Did they spent sleepless nights looking after me?Did they brought me up?NO How will you feel if you brother leaves your parents for his wife? This a **** view that you have got.Absolutely ****. DId the husbands parents give birth to the wife? Did they spend sleepless nights to look after her ? Why should she be responsible for looking after the guys parents.The guy got the care and attention so he should look after.Why should she spend the rest of her life doing that. The guy should do what DIL's are expected to do.....Get up in the morning ..feed people breakfast,make lunch ....go to work....come back dead tired and enter the kitchen ,make dinner, serve dinner,prepare for next day... go to bed .Repeat again the next day.The DIL should ...go to work ,come back and sit in front of the Tv and be served. Try living in the DIL's shoes and then talk. If DIL's were treated better ,this problem wouldn't be there. If only the parents of boys could treat the DIL's like their son's are treated by their inlaws. What about the families with only daughters or sons who for some reason can't live in the joint family? As for my brother looking after my parents.....My parents don't want to stay with any of the children till they can live on their own.They have their own life and don't want to change their lifestyle for anyone. When the time comes for them to choose ...they can choose any one of their children to stay with.Why should they be forced to live only with the son? Edited January 18, 2017 by beetle Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
velu Posted August 18, 2013 Share Posted August 18, 2013 Did some googling.. In places like lakshadweep after marriage husband move to her wife's home Can't imagine how much these husbands suffer Sent from my Nexus 4 using Tapatalk 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
beetle Posted August 18, 2013 Share Posted August 18, 2013 Did some googling.. In places like lakshadweep after marriage husband move to her wife's home Can't imagine how much these husbands suffer Sent from my Nexus 4 using Tapatalk 4 Same as the wives in the rest of the country I guess...:giggle: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
randomGuy Posted August 18, 2013 Share Posted August 18, 2013 @beetle - Nice post. Like there are problems with guy's and his family's attitude, there is problem with girls' and their families' attitude too for ex. they never want to settle for a guy who is equal to or shorter than the girl, less educated than the girl or earning less than the girl. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
beetle Posted August 18, 2013 Share Posted August 18, 2013 @beetle - Nice post. Like there are problems with guy's and his family's attitude, there is problem with girls' and their families' attitude too for ex. they never want to settle for a guy who is equal to or shorter than the girl, less educated than the girl or earning less than the girl. True.... Although the education and earning bit is changing.There are already a few couples in my family where the girl is earning more than the guy ...or where the girl has the stable job and guy experiments with different stuff.Although I must add that in almost all cases the guy was earning more at the time of the wedding and all these were love marriages. Waisay My view in life is that the rules regarding what DIL, inlaws are expected to do and what sons are expected to do are way to rigid. Parents Firstly why should parents be forced to live with someone irrespective of whether they want to or not...why can't they be free to choose which child they want to be with or if they prefer to go to an old age home? Why should parents be forced to live with children because both couple are working and they need some one to take care of the babies?I have seen this happen so often in my family and it is unfair to tie down the old parents again after they have finished of with their responsibility. If the children want to take care of the parents,it should be because of that sentiment alone and not because they want free and responsible nannies. DILs I have already written about this. Most DILs if treated with respect and love would not mind looking after the old parents when they are really old and need care as long as the husband is also readly to help with caring for her parents too irrespective of what her brother is doing. Sons Sons should not take it for granted that his life partner will like to stay with and serve his parents. If he does, then it is his responsibility to make sure that the new member is provided with a happy environment to live in. It is his duty to ensure that the wife is treated well or else do not force her to be in a hostile space. When you expect your wife to look after your parents...do the same for hers too. If she has a brother ,you too have siblings. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
randomGuy Posted August 18, 2013 Share Posted August 18, 2013 Lots depend on circumstances, like number of guy's siblings, size of the house, difference in personalities of DIL and guy's parents, how much independent their lives are with-in the shared house, jobs often make people change cities-live in nuclear families. Old people usually require a bit of respect, attention and love. If they are given these, they happily and readily give you all their love, cooperation and property ;) . DILs also do not realize this sometimes. kabhi kabhi chhota ban-ne main koi loss nahi hai in-laws ke samne as long as your husband and you have each others' trust. I agree with your thought that its not a bad option to live in nuclear families if quality of life is compromised in shared house... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
beetle Posted August 18, 2013 Share Posted August 18, 2013 ^^^ Even joint families work for a lot of people but it should not be forced. Besides people should live with who they want to live with...... I know of many cases where DIL and Mil couldn't live together .I also know of a Dil who takes care of her MIL from her previous marriage even after her second marriage.Her first husband died. This was a precondition from her side for the remarriage. She doesn't live with her but goes to her often to make sure she is fine.Takes care of her domestic needs,banking and her medical needs. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
randomGuy Posted August 18, 2013 Share Posted August 18, 2013 Absolutely it shouldn't be forced. Fully agreed. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CSK Fan Posted August 18, 2013 Share Posted August 18, 2013 How will you feel if you brother leaves your parents for his wife? This a **** view that you have got.Absolutely ****. I am sorry, but the weird view is yours you are saying this to someone who actually had to leave her entire family and parents behind to go live with her husband's family. So she would know more than you Why should a guy going to live with his wife's family be any different? Maybe the daughter can take care of the parents and the son can go live with the wife's family. Only thing che che about it is for the son, otherwise am sure a daughter, particularly a house wife, can look after the parents better than a working son Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
beetle Posted August 18, 2013 Share Posted August 18, 2013 If anyone cares ...here is an honest opinion. The one thing that DILs want is freedom to be adults and to be treated like adults. To not have to take permission whether going out to work or to visit her parents.To not have to be told what to wear,when to get up,where to work ,what to eat,how to bring up her children.Just some basic respect and freedom. P.S...Stop acting like little boys in front of your wife at least....don't let your mommy feed you khana with her hands...don't lie down in your mom's godi and stop saying mommy se pooch ke bataounga.Most woman expect their husbands to be adults.:P Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ram Posted August 18, 2013 Share Posted August 18, 2013 If anyone cares ...here is an honest opinion. The one thing that DILs want is freedom to be adults and to be treated like adults. To not have to take permission whether going out to work or to visit her parents.To not have to be told what to wear,when to get up,where to work ,what to eat,how to bring up her children.Just some basic respect and freedom. P.S...Stop acting like little boys in front of your wife at least....don't let your mommy feed you khana with her hands...don't lie down in your mom's godi and stop saying mommy se pooch ke bataounga.Most woman expect their husbands to be adults.:P :two_thumbs_up: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
randomGuy Posted August 18, 2013 Share Posted August 18, 2013 Bond with your wife's family too na....values' date='culture and family bonding double ho jaegi.Spend half your life looking after and doing seva of your wife's parents too.[/quote'] I am an unmarried guy but I can say that society's norms, expectations from girl and her family and my own little ego will deter me from staying in a house which is in the name of my future wife's parents. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Malcolm Merlyn Posted August 18, 2013 Share Posted August 18, 2013 DId the husbands parents give birth to the wife? Did they spend sleepless nights to look after her ? Why should she be responsible for looking after the guys parents.The guy got the care and attention so he should look after.Why should she spend the rest of her life doing that. The guy should do what DIL's are expected to do.....Get up in the morning ..feed people breakfast,make lunch ....go to work....come back dead tired and enter the kitchen ,make dinner, serve dinner,prepare for next day... go to bed .Repeat again the next day.The DIL should ...go to work ,come back and sit in front of the Tv and be served. Try living in the DIL's shoes and then talk. If DIL's were treated better ,this problem wouldn't be there. If only the parents of boys could treat the DIL's like their son's are treated by their inlaws. What about the families with only daughters or sons who for some reason can't live in the joint family? As for my brother looking after my parents.....My parents don't want to stay with any of the children till they can live on their own.They have their own life and don't want to change their lifestyle for anyone. When the time comes for them to choose ...they can choose any one of their three children (a son and two daughters)to stay with.Why should they be forced to live only with the son? Did you say all this to your husband and his family before you got married? I am sorry, but the weird view is yours you are saying this to someone who actually had to leave her entire family and parents behind to go live with her husband's family. So she would know more than you Why should a guy going to live with his wife's family be any different? Maybe the daughter can take care of the parents and the son can go live with the wife's family. Only thing che che about it is for the son, otherwise am sure a daughter, particularly a house wife, can look after the parents better than a working son Let her answer my question and i will continue after that. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Holysmoke Posted August 18, 2013 Share Posted August 18, 2013 /ignore. DO NOT WANT TO THINK ABOUT IT. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
yoda Posted August 18, 2013 Share Posted August 18, 2013 The guy should do what DIL's are expected to do.....Get up in the morning ..feed people breakfast,make lunch ....go to work....come back dead tired and enter the kitchen ,make dinner, serve dinner,prepare for next day... go to bed .Repeat again the next day.The DIL should ...go to work ,come back and sit in front of the Tv and be served. Try living in the DIL's shoes and then talk. Now you know why women were asked to just stay at home just take care of the kitchen, produce babies and take care of their beloved hubbies. If only the women of today had listened they wouldn't have to put up with all that BS of working and coming home tired. :P Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CSK Fan Posted August 18, 2013 Share Posted August 18, 2013 I am an unmarried guy but I can say that society's norms' date=' expectations from girl and her family and my own little ego will deter me from staying in a house which is in the name of my future wife's parents.[/quote'] Which is fair enough. But the least you can do is not call the other's opinion as weird when women have been enduring centuries of such sh!t Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CSK Fan Posted August 18, 2013 Share Posted August 18, 2013 Did you say all this to your husband and his family before you got married? Let her answer my question and i will continue after that. Why would her answer make any difference. If some guy doesn't want to marry a girl because of her open views, or some woman is ok with the current situation, how is that adding anything to the point? I dont know how getting personal is helping anything There are lots of people who think certain situations should be improved but they themselves might not be in a position to be the leader or work towards that improvement. doesn't mean they still cannot have a voice or an opinion Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
KeyboardWarrior Posted August 18, 2013 Share Posted August 18, 2013 I think we all (Singles) are Infected to this Shadi Virus now ..... :(( Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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