beetle Posted August 18, 2013 Share Posted August 18, 2013 (edited) Quote Did you say all this to your husband and his family before you got married? ....................... Edited January 18, 2017 by beetle Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
maniac Posted August 18, 2013 Share Posted August 18, 2013 Don't ever tell your wife you miss your mom's food or eat those extra Rotis or curry than usual when your mom makes them for you Just don't Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
maniac Posted August 18, 2013 Share Posted August 18, 2013 Don't ever make fun of her family member....is she makes a joke about them.....don't over do the laugh or don't get carried away Just don't Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Malcolm Merlyn Posted August 18, 2013 Share Posted August 18, 2013 I married a defence officer...my mother in law (and my mother) married defene officers.Mom and Mom in law lived in nuclear families all their lives. My mom's FIL came to stay with my parents in the last few years of his life .She looked after him well till he lived. My MIL's MIL came to live with her in her last few yrs after her husband passed away and I am sure my MIL took great care of her.And My mom in law took care of her own mother also in her last few months. When I got married,I knew,My husband knew,my in laws knew, my parents knew, the whole neighbor hood knew that I would be living with my husband where ever he was posted while my in laws would live a retired life in their house. My parents would not have wanted me to marry in a joint family. My mom in law doesn't have a daughter so I can't really speak for her. My mom in law never lived with her in laws but moved in with her civilian son the day he got married(inspired by the saas bahu serials she watches)...They almost got divorced in the first year. Inlaws finally moved into their own place. Bolded part is the only thing that is being asked from a DIL.Where would a old MIL or FIL go? Your MIL didnt live with her in laws because your FIL was in defence and he had to move around.Your civilian devar may not have to move around and thats why she shifted to his place.Now that she has had to leave his place i doubt she will ever again move with any of her sons.No matter how painful it is or difficult it is for her to manage everything on her own or to live without her sons.One day when you will go through the same you will understand what i mean.To live without any of their children. If someone is not so interested in living with MIL and FIL they should make it clear before marriage and if they want a separate place they should make that clear as well.And not try to be the ideal DIL before marriage and the break relations/hurt feelings etc post marriage.Thats what most DILs do in this country.Shaadi ke pehle ek,shaadi ke baad ek. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
beetle Posted August 18, 2013 Share Posted August 18, 2013 I am an unmarried guy but I can say that society's norms' date=' expectations from girl and her family and my own little ego will deter me from staying in a house which is in the name of my future wife's parents.[/quote'] I totally get what you feel. If you can find a girl who gets along with your family and whom your family gets along with...you have hit a jackpot. Other wise there are many sane options available like staying close by or even in the same place but different households. One of my cousin here has such an arrangement . They stay in adjoining houses with inlaws and the girls parents stay 2 floors above. This arrangement was done recently when both sets of parents got old. The in laws and parents sold their houses and bought houses in the same building. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Malcolm Merlyn Posted August 18, 2013 Share Posted August 18, 2013 Why would her answer make any difference. If some guy doesn't want to marry a girl because of her open views, or some woman is ok with the current situation, how is that adding anything to the point? I dont know how getting personal is helping anything There are lots of people who think certain situations should be improved but they themselves might not be in a position to be the leader or work towards that improvement. doesn't mean they still cannot have a voice or an opinion 99.99% women open their views after marriage.Before marriage they are all good with the IL family.As soon as she becomes the part of the family many will try to create a own nest. If you have open views,fine.Air them before marriage so the guy knows what he is getting into. Wives will talk to their MOMz and discuss all and sundry with them but Husbands are not allowed to do so.If they want to take their Mom's advise then they are not being adult.Thats BS!!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
adi B Posted August 18, 2013 Share Posted August 18, 2013 Don't ever make fun of her family member....is she makes a joke about them.....don't over do the laugh or don't get carried away Just don't whats the odd ur wife does not have an icf account with an unusual name and reading all the stuffs u have written :nervous: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
maniac Posted August 18, 2013 Share Posted August 18, 2013 whats the odd ur wife does not have an icf account with an unusual name and reading all the stuffs u have written :nervous: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Yoda-esque Posted August 18, 2013 Share Posted August 18, 2013 whats the odd ur wife does not have an icf account with an unusual name and reading all the stuffs u have written :nervous: My wife knows my id and I have already posted something on this thread that she might not exactly like. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Malcolm Merlyn Posted August 18, 2013 Share Posted August 18, 2013 My wife knows my id and I have already posted something on this thread that she might not exactly like. Expect to sleep in the drawing room. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Yoda-esque Posted August 18, 2013 Share Posted August 18, 2013 Expect to sleep in the drawing room. Already sleeping there Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Number Posted August 18, 2013 Author Share Posted August 18, 2013 Can't wait to get married now. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
maniac Posted August 18, 2013 Share Posted August 18, 2013 Don't ever boast that you have never taken a single rupee in dowry....apparently doesn't make you better person,makes you an a-hole for even bringing that up.....kinda debatable,but still...... Just don't Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Yoda-esque Posted August 18, 2013 Share Posted August 18, 2013 Don't ever boast that you have never taken a single rupee in dowry....apparently doesn't make you better person,makes you an a-hole for even bringing that up.....kinda debatable,but still...... Just don't Is that boastable?:giggle: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
velu Posted August 18, 2013 Share Posted August 18, 2013 Don't ever boast that you have never taken a single rupee in dowry....apparently doesn't make you better person,makes you an a-hole for even bringing that up.....kinda debatable,but still...... Just don't I m not taking even a single rupee Sent from my Nexus 4 using Tapatalk 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
maniac Posted August 18, 2013 Share Posted August 18, 2013 Is that boastable?:giggle: Makes me feel like a better person compared to a lot of people I know.....I earned it:--D...c'mon I need an ego boost once in a while :dontknow: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
beetle Posted August 18, 2013 Share Posted August 18, 2013 (edited) Quote Bolded part is the only thing that is being asked from a DIL.Where would a old MIL or FIL go? Your MIL didnt live with her in laws because your FIL was in defence and he had to move around.Your civilian devar may not have to move around and thats why she shifted to his place.Now that she has had to leave his place i doubt she will ever again move with any of her sons.No matter how painful it is or difficult it is for her to manage everything on her own or to live without her sons.One day when you will go through the same you will understand what i mean.To live without any of their children. If someone is not so interested in living with MIL and FIL they should make it clear before marriage and if they want a separate place they should make that clear as well.And not try to be the ideal DIL before marriage and the break relations/hurt feelings etc post marriage.Thats what most DILs do in this country.Shaadi ke pehle ek,shaadi ke baad ek. ................................................................ Edited January 18, 2017 by beetle Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
maniac Posted August 18, 2013 Share Posted August 18, 2013 I m not taking even a single rupee Sent from my Nexus 4 using Tapatalk 4 :two_thumbs_up: Your a-hole meter still doesn't come down on that basis :secret: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
beetle Posted August 18, 2013 Share Posted August 18, 2013 Now you know why women were asked to just stay at home just take care of the kitchen' date=' produce babies and take care of their beloved hubbies. If only the women of today had listened they wouldn't have to put up with all that BS of working and coming home tired. :P[/quote'] Haath se nikal gayee...ab to kuch nahi ho sakta bhai...ab sudhar jao.:giggle::icflove: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
maniac Posted August 18, 2013 Share Posted August 18, 2013 If your wife has a younger brother.....remember he is forever a kid......so whenever he says something offensive or does anything stupid,just go cho chweeet Just do it Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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