Ram Posted February 3, 2011 Posted February 3, 2011 Not referring to anyone in particular here - I have to say that for those who have confessed to even a moderate reforming of their attitudes towards their servants/house-maids/domestic-helps (whatever politically correct name you want to call it), AFTER they lived for a considerate time in the West or somewhere else where, at least on the surface, everyone seems to be treated to be reasonably well (the actual truth however, is much different. There’s discrimination and mis-treatment EVERYWHERE. It only comes in different shades), then I am sorry to say you really need to take a good look at yourself. You shouldn’t be told or need to have experienced decent treatment of fellow humans in first person to act the same way. Respect for human dignity and deceny is innate in all of us. If it so happened that you had to re-think your attitude only AFTER living in the west for a while, then that is truly a worrying phenomenon. I can understand a few of the attitudes/mindsets that can change, if someobody lives abroad for a while. I, for example, didn’t have my moral compass in the right place, when I was young. I used to copy during exams when I was in school. Though you can brush this off as a rather harmless infringement, still, that is something I now I wish I hadn’t done back then. There are a few other small things here and there. But I don’t see how you can possibly include ‘My attitude towards my domestic servants’ in the list of things that underwent a change.
Rajiv Posted February 3, 2011 Author Posted February 3, 2011 We all live in a hypocritical world, the only problem is not many like to accept it In theory, you are right but unfortunately it's not the same in reality. It's not a question of looking at yourself, it's a culture we are brought up in which varies form being a commanding boss or a friendly one. I think I got my answer from holy and fbm - it does make a difference as its first hand experience
coffee_rules Posted February 3, 2011 Posted February 3, 2011 Not referring to anyone in particular here - I have to say that for those who have confessed to even a moderate reforming of their attitudes towards their servants/house-maids/domestic-helps (whatever politically correct name you want to call it), AFTER they lived for a considerate time in the West or somewhere else where, at least on the surface, everyone seems to be treated to be reasonably well (the actual truth however, is much different. There’s discrimination and mis-treatment EVERYWHERE. It only comes in different shades), then I am sorry to say you really need to take a good look at yourself. Longest sentence ! I had to read it twice matching parenthesis (with a % key as in vi).
fineleg Posted February 4, 2011 Posted February 4, 2011 ^^^ Who told you that dishwashers are unheard of in India? We have a dishwasher at home. His name is Munna. Can you please ask him to bowl > 135 in ODIs, and to be more agile in the fielding. kthxbai We all live in a hypocritical world, the only problem is not many like to accept it In theory, you are right but unfortunately it's not the same in reality. It's not a question of looking at yourself, it's a culture we are brought up in which varies form being a commanding boss or a friendly one. I think I got my answer from holy and fbm - it does make a difference as its first hand experience Agree with Rajiv. What sirrom (thats the new reverse for marirs) is saying is not what reality is in India. People do change after they live abroad and they learn dignity of labor.
jf1gp_1 Posted February 4, 2011 Posted February 4, 2011 Can you please ask him to bowl > 135 in ODIs, and to be more agile in the fielding. kthxbai Agree with Rajiv. What sirrom (thats the new reverse for marirs) is saying is not what reality is in India. People do change after they live abroad and they learn dignity of labor. Naah i dont think people change; for ppl to change you need the right environment, so if their are ppl around you who treat domestic help well then so will you, are you telling me when visiting India you hold door for a stranger or look for a bin to throw trash when not at home etc etc ??
f.b.m Posted February 4, 2011 Posted February 4, 2011 Not referring to anyone in particular here - I have to say that for those who have confessed to even a moderate reforming of their attitudes towards their servants/house-maids/domestic-helps (whatever politically correct name you want to call it), AFTER they lived for a considerate time in the West or somewhere else where, at least on the surface, everyone seems to be treated to be reasonably well (the actual truth however, is much different. This sentence is way too long to make any sense. Anyway, to the 'JOO AAR IIIVIL!!' argument my change in attitude was in having a maid servant in the first place not about treating them humanely. I left the country when I was 12 which hardly gives any time for mistreatment and abooz.
punjabi_khota Posted February 4, 2011 Posted February 4, 2011 Well when I think about it, my attitude or respect has gone up for firefighters. I mean, in India no one gives a hoot about the dangerous job they do, but in JOO ESS AAY, firefighters are like heroes and ****...
coffee_rules Posted February 4, 2011 Posted February 4, 2011 Naah i dont think people change; for ppl to change you need the right environment' date=' so if their are ppl around you who treat domestic help well then so will you, [b']are you telling me when visiting India you hold door for a stranger or look for a bin to throw trash when not at home etc etc ?? Yes, I do. I have even driven more sanely on the roads, but have spent more time waiting as once you wait, they pile on. But definitely there is a change in attitude towards a lot - towards domestic help, yes more humane. They expect more now after knowing that I have gone abroad, they expect dollars to be handed out. - following the queue/staying in line more religiously. But after sometime, you give in looking at how the mob behaves, else you will be left waiting. - staying in contact with friends and relatives more often. - couple of times, I even greeted strangers, had to stop after getting weird cold looks. - totally throwing trash out. This one thing comes naturally and more consciously. I have even yelled at strangers for trashing, spitting, urinating, etc.
DomainK Posted February 4, 2011 Posted February 4, 2011 Naah i dont think people change; for ppl to change you need the right environment' date=' so if their are ppl around you who treat domestic help well then so will you, are you telling me when visiting India you hold door for a stranger or look for a bin to throw trash when not at home etc etc ??[/quote'] Habits do change and this has more to do with habits that can change though experience and exposure. However, I do not entirely agree with the notion that one has to go abroad to learn to respect a certain class. Besides, in India, you can not be overly polite to them. It will be mostly interpreted as "showing an unusual interest" and the maid will take evey possible advantage of it. If a husband feels bad for a maid sweeping the floor, he might just end up getting divorced. :phehehe: In India you font feel bad for them doing the household work. Not anymore than you feel bad for someone else picking up your luggage when you check into a hotel or when you send your laundry to be cleaned by someone else.
Ram Posted February 4, 2011 Posted February 4, 2011 This sentence is way too long to make any sense. Anyway' date=' to the 'JOO AAR IIIVIL!!' argument my change in attitude was in having a maid servant in the first place not about treating them humanely. I left the country when I was 12 which hardly gives any time for mistreatment and abooz.[/quote'] Never said ‘JOO AAR IIVUL’ or anything along those lines. My point is rather simple and straightforward – you shouldn’t be told or had to have seen decent treatment of fellow humans in first person, whoever it maybe, to act the same.
jf1gp_1 Posted February 4, 2011 Posted February 4, 2011 what about cycle rickshaws which not only carry people but also as mode of transporting goods ?Does anyone feel bad for those rickshawalas ?
Gunner_Mania Posted February 4, 2011 Posted February 4, 2011 Naah i dont think people change; for ppl to change you need the right environment' date=' so if their are ppl around you who treat domestic help well then so will you, are you telling me [b']when visiting India you hold door for a stranger or look for a bin to throw trash when not at home etc etc ?? I did that even while I was in India and still do it when I return to India.
The Outsider Posted February 4, 2011 Posted February 4, 2011 what about cycle rickshaws which not only carry people but also as mode of transporting goods ?Does anyone feel bad for those rickshawalas ? As bad as for people who have stitched your Reebok shoes and Levis jeans.
jhakati Posted February 4, 2011 Posted February 4, 2011 Not referring to anyone in particular here - I have to say that for those who have confessed to even a moderate reforming of their attitudes towards their servants/house-maids/domestic-helps (whatever politically correct name you want to call it), AFTER they lived for a considerate time in the West or somewhere else where, at least on the surface, everyone seems to be treated to be reasonably well (the actual truth however, is much different. There’s discrimination and mis-treatment EVERYWHERE. It only comes in different shades), then I am sorry to say you really need to take a good look at yourself. You shouldn’t be told or need to have experienced decent treatment of fellow humans in first person to act the same way. Respect for human dignity and deceny is innate in all of us. If it so happened that you had to re-think your attitude only AFTER living in the west for a while, then that is truly a worrying phenomenon. I can understand a few of the attitudes/mindsets that can change, if someobody lives abroad for a while. I, for example, didn’t have my moral compass in the right place, when I was young. I used to copy during exams when I was in school. Though you can brush this off as a rather harmless infringement, still, that is something I now I wish I hadn’t done back then. There are a few other small things here and there. But I don’t see how you can possibly include ‘My attitude towards my domestic servants’ in the list of things that underwent a change. lol woah mr.saint don't judge other people's character based on ur experiences:hysterical: if anything people who admit to something like rajiv and i did should be admired for their honesty. change is always a good thing, especially if it based on a humane reason, then even better so it needs to be appluaded. it's like the whites who pre-segragation mistreated blacks but many regretted it later, and thats not a bad thing. amazes me how people are quick to judge others when their own hearts are filled with darkness:giggle:
Ram Posted February 4, 2011 Posted February 4, 2011 lol woah mr.saint don't judge other people's character based on ur experiences:hysterical: if anything people who admit to something like rajiv and i did should be admired for their honesty. change is always a good thing, especially if it based on a humane reason, then even better so it needs to be appluaded. it's like the whites who pre-segragation mistreated blacks but many regretted it later, and thats not a bad thing. amazes me how people are quick to judge others when their own hearts are filled with darkness:giggle: Calm down hero. First of all, I don’t prizes for judging other peoples’ character, nor do I have anything to gain/lose from it. Besides, I have even admitted that I am not 100% clean either. But I can confidently say that I did not treat my house-maids/servants any differently back then, as opposed to what I do now. I wasn’t told by anybody to treat them well, nor did I have to wait till I went abroad to learn about that either. I would like think that would be the default stand everyone would take. If you or for that matter, anyone else, feel that your attitude towards your house-maids underwent a change AFTER your stay abroad, then kudos to your honesty. But still, you should pause for a moment to reflect on why it wasn’t where it should be have, earlier.
Rajiv Posted February 4, 2011 Author Posted February 4, 2011 Habits do change and this has more to do with habits that can change though experience and exposure. However, I do not entirely agree with the notion that one has to go abroad to learn to respect a certain class. Besides, in India, you can not be overly polite to them. It will be mostly interpreted as "showing an unusual interest" and the maid will take evey possible advantage of it. If a husband feels bad for a maid sweeping the floor, he might just end up getting divorced. :phehehe: In India you font feel bad for them doing the household work. Not anymore than you feel bad for someone else picking up your luggage when you check into a hotel or when you send your laundry to be cleaned by someone else. But Sir, have you spent a substantial amount of time outside India? In fact, some things are annoying - this happened to be last time I went to India, I was jet lagged and my friend called so I simply told him bud I am sleeping I will call back, this was a big issue - why didn’t I talk to him? He told another friend and was like bada addmi aaya hain foregn se..I was like, I forgot, my tone should have been - "aree yaar, phat gayi meri yaar, thioda sone de..phiir baat karta hu" BTW, just for kicks - speaking of "Phoreign Return" - have you guys seen this movie Govind Nihaliani's - Karm Yodha Raj Babbar returns form US and sees a murder, and wants to file a report but his family against it. Fantastic movie
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